107 Miles

Chapter Ten

I wake up to someone knocking on the bedroom door. I open it up just a crack to see who it is. Two blue eyes catch mine and I know it's Mike. He had already told me he had to go back to the firm today. Harvey needed him and he didn't know how long I needed to stay here. After our fight last night, I don't want him to go even more.

I open the door wide and he comes in the room. When he passes by me, I smell his cologne and my knees go weak. That's a smell I've come to long for this last month or so. It has so much of an effect on me.

"I've got to go today. I don't want to after this, Katrina. But I have to get back," Mike says in a low voice.

"I know. I know, Mike. I'm sorry for just storming out last night. And I'm sorry for what happened with Joshua. I was throwing him in your face. I want to let you in. I just don't know how," I tell him honestly.

"It's okay, Katrina. I should have more trust in you. I just saw the way you fell so comfortably into conversation with him and he was able to make you laugh and feel like yourself. It was just too much for me," Mike says.

"He'll always be that guy, Mike. And I know we've only been together for a little over a month. This is definitely too much too soon. But I want to make this work. I really like you and spending time with you is my favorite thing to do. Please don't give up on me," I tell him with the utmost level of vulnerability.

He walks closer to me and puts his hands on my shoulders. He does nothing but hold my world together.

"Okay, Katrina. I need to get going. Can we talk later? I'll call you when I get back home," he says abruptly.

"Oh, I say, "yeah let me know when you get in." I just put myself on the line and he didn't respond to that. I might as well have told him I love him. I think I might. But I've scared him away. It's just what I do. This is new though, the fact that he's leaving. Every guy I've dated, including Joshua, I have left first because I was afraid of losing them. To protect myself, I leave before I get left.

I walk with Mike downstairs and watch him tell my family goodbye. Elizabeth keeps her eyes on me the whole time. She sees I'm upset and gives me a slight nod of encouragement.

As I watch his car leave again, I feel remorse for telling him not to give up on me. The practical part of me knows that he had to leave, but I yearn for him to have stayed with me. But everything's different now.