Cabin Nine [[Revised Edition] Under FURTHER Revision]

Thirty

That summer, Jack comes home to Minnesota and we spend the entire afternoon and evening tangled together on the couch. Not doing anything, just trying to get as close to each other as possible while still being PG-13 for his parents' sake.

We both fall asleep eventually and I wake up in Jack's room. He's not asleep, just staring at me. He smiles when I open my eyes and I can't help but smile back. I'm still in that sleepy state of where am I? but Jack being there erases that panic entirely. He needs to stop carrying me to bed like a child, but I do love being here with him like this.

I never realised how much I missed his hair, his eyes, his freckles. The curve of his nose from that time he broke it during soccer practice. The dip of his cheekbones. The way his eyelashes touch his cheeks when he blinks.

I love him so much I can hardly stand it.

"So my parents are gone," he whispers, grinning.

"I can't believe we just finished our first year of college and we still have to tiptoe around your parents," I reply.

Jack just laughs.

Mom and Dad come back while we're still in the shower, which makes it awkward when we both come out at the same time. But they don't mention it and we don't mention it, so it's not as big a problem as I thought it would be.

Louisa and Susie come over and the six of us have dinner together. It's fun and amazing and... God, I can't believe we didn't do this sooner. It's so nice to have him home.

And too soon, it's time for camp. It's our first year as counselors. We should've been last year, but we were busy with worrying about college and stuff, so Jason told Hunter it was Jack's punishment for hitting a counselor and that I stayed with him out of solidarity. It got Hunter off our back, but Jason says he's still not very okay with us.

Us as people, not us as gay people. Evidently, he's completely fine with LGBT+ people, just not me and Jack. I hate that. I hate Hunter. Okay, I don't hate Hunter. I hate that he hates us because we're together. Out of all the counselors, I wouldn't have pegged him as homophobic, even from a distance. He might be one of those "I don't hate gay people, I just don't agree with their lifestyle" people and that kills me. How many years did he spend cultivating my internalised homophobia without me realising it?

I'm not the sharpest lightbulb in the attic, so if either of us noticed, it would've been Jack. I wish I could remember if he did anything like that, but I can hardly remember what I ate for breakfast. I don't know how I do anything without Jack.

Jason seems really excited about us being counselors. Probably because we already know everything, so we don't have to go through the training and he doesn't have to pay for two extra people. I know how everything works and Jack knows all the people, so we're a great pair.

This is the year that Jason promised to have a specialised theme for us.

We don't have to hide our relationhip this year because Jason's chosen theme is support or acceptance and all that jumk and we're their token gay couple. The entire camp is decked out in rainbows. Jack is mesmerized but I find it kind of nauseating. I don't tell him that. He's so happy about all of it, I don't want to ruin it.

I mean, Jason did tell us that the camp would be undeniably LGBT+ friendly, so I don't know why I'm surprised that he went overboard. It's what he always does.

The little kids mostly don't understand the whole thing, but that's fine and fully expected. They're completely in awe of me and Jack. A lot of them didn't know that "two boys can have crushes on each other" as they say. I love kids, but I wish they weren't so full of questions.