jan 7, 2015
Dear Lily,
We sat in the woods today. We had a more intimate conversation than we did yesterday, filled with me telling you multiple times that you were beautiful and that you deserved to be happy. It wasn't just because I want you to feel better, it was because I actually believed it. You blushed every time and denied it, which only made me upset.
I want you to be happy when you're with me. "You know I care about you right?" I asked you. You responded with a simple shrug then answered with "I don't know, you're probably just trying to make me feel better," many seconds later. I told you I wanted you to forget about all the bad things that were going on in your life when you were with me.
So then I proposed an idea. "How about when the next train comes passed, we scream as loud as we can. Try to be louder than the train, let everything out. I don't want you to be stressed while you're with me." You looked very unsure. But to my surprise, you screamed over the sound of the train as it passed.
As soon as the train passed and we no longer feel it shaking the ground I let out a small laugh. This was when the thing that shocked me most happened. You smiled. And I was the reason for it! Maybe it still wasn't the same as your old smile, but it was better than nothing.
I didn't stop cracking jokes and making a fool of myself for the rest of the day just so I could see your smile.
Love,
Ashley
YOU ARE READING
hold on till may • halsey
Fanfiction"if i were you i'd put that away. see you're just wasted and thinking bout the past again. darling, you'll be okay."
