Like Catching Lightning

Chapter 9

"i-i don't know what you are talking about!" i stuttered, backing against the wall. "why would you call me nina? my name is hazel." 

big red chuckled, watching me amused. "please, nina, you don't fool me. i'm honestly surprised that you have fooled anyone."

there is no way he could have found out. not this quickly at least. deny, deny deny. 

"red, i don't-" 

big red cut me off by walking towards we slowly. his hand came up to the side of my neck as i felt his freckled fingers move. was he going to strangle me? what was happening? 

carefully, he pulled the silver chain of my necklace up until the butterfly was out of my shirt and resting against my chest.

"that's the necklace that ricky gave you for your fifth friendaversary." red spoke. "and you gave him that ring that he refuses to take off." 

i stepped away from red's grip, placing the necklace back in my shirt gingerly. "big red, i have no clue what you mean." i replied stubbornly. i was NOT giving up. "if nina has this necklace too that must just be coincidence, because i know for a fact that i am not her." 

big red hummed a chuckle, looking towards the boxes in the closet. "don't think i haven't noticed how obvious you have tried to make it. that day you met ricky in the starbucks and he insulted you on tv; i saw the way you looked at him after he said that and i saw the tears in your eyes." my eyes widened, but red continued speaking. "and your lock screen, it's the concert that you played ricky's favorite taylor swift song, story of us. then you cried afterwards and it was crazy on social media for days." i did do that, didn't i. "and also, telling everyone that you live in la? you are just asking for people to figure out. and you are living with your aunts as in plural, more than one aunt. carol and dana, right? you are living with your moms nina. someone was bound to figure out sometime or another, how long did you think you could possibly keep this secret?"

i looked up at him with tears filling my eyes. it was over, someone had figured out. what was i supposed to do know? he could tell everyone!

"longer than this." i muttered, wiping a tear from my cheek. 

red sat down on one of the boxes and looked up at me. "why did you do it?" he asked. "pretended to be someone else?"

i took a seat next him, pulling out my necklace and fiddling with it once again. "i just wanted a chance to be normal. a chance to see ricky again. i didn't know he would hate me like this, though. so i saw an opportunity to be someone else and i took it." avoiding eye contact at all costs, i looked down at my shoes. "i know i overstepped some boarders, but i was so sick of my life. this was the only way that made sense." 

"i'm not saying that it doesn't make sense." big red said. "in fact it makes total sense. i do the exact same thing if i were famous and i hated it." he smiled at me goofily, making me laugh a little. "but you do know how much you hurt ricky right?" red questioned. "like, you might as well have taken a knife and stabbed him with it. even if you did do that, he would have said thank you or something." 

"yeah, i know." i mumbled. "i didn't want to leave him, really i didn't. but i wasn't given a choice either. i wasn't given a choice when i was told i was going to move to la, when i was told that i had to dye my hair blonde, when i was told i needed to forget my friends especially ricky, none of that i got a say in." 

big red nodded, showing that he understood, but didn't say anything, so i kept talking .

"this is the first time i have ever really been able to do things myself without someone guiding my every decision." i explained. "i just want this chance to be free and not salt lake cities 'pride and joy' or jenn reinders 'star'. you know?" 

"yeah, i dig." big red shrugged. "i understand why you want this so badly, but what's going to happen when you leave? is ricky going to just get hurt all over again but because of a whole 'nother girl? that isn't fair to him."

"none of this is fair to him, and i feel terrible about that." i admit. "but i'm in way too deep. i can't just step away now, i don't know how do that! i don't know what to do, red." i bury my face in my hands, more tears streaming down my face. "i wish i never posted that stupid video on youtube seven years ago." 

i felt big red's comforting hand on my shoulder, causing me to look up. he was smiling sadly down at me, rubbing my arm softly. "don't say that, nina. you didn't know what was going to happen." 

"yeah, but i shoulder off thought about it. thought about the conciquences." i sniffled, wiping away some more tears. "please don't tell anyone, red. it's only for three months, i'll be gone before anyone knows it. just please, keep it a secret!" i begged.

red's eyes narrowed. "what's in it for me?" 

"um," i thought about it for a second. "vip tickets to harry styles next concert?"

"that's all i need, we good." he hopped up from his box, reaching his hand down to mine. "come on, we have classes to get to." 

i grabbed his hand and pulled myself up, because let's be honest, red has no muscle. the man is a stick. a very, very bony stick. 

"just promise me one thing, for my boy." he asked. i hummed in response, signaling he should continue. "tell him at some point. he has a right to know who you actually are nina." 

i sighed. my plan was to not tell him and just to leave when the time came. but what good would that do? i did need to tell him at some point i suppose. "okay." i said eventually. "and please, call me nini." 

big red grinned at me, opening the door. "nini it is. good luck with ricky, he is the best person you could ever ask for."

i smiled at him brightly, before beginning to walk away.

"believe me, red, i know." 

Author's Note:

sorry this one is kinda short. but nini's secret it out! i wonder what going to happen now.