Flick of the Wrist ↠Maylor↞✔

I24I - Death on Two Legs

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Brian's forced smile fades that was once his facade covering his worry and doubt. I hate seeing that, his reaction to my words about Cory trying to force me physically to stay put in that bedroom. I don't know to go into detail or not or how much weight to put onto the situation. I could be overreacting, I don't know what is considered bad anymore.

He doesn't say anything at all, he is just speechless. It isn't too surprising, what happened or how reaction. It was either Cory who was asleep or gets fucking hurt.

Brain's hand placed in mine has no movement either as if he is stuck there. It's making me feel worse, darting my eyes away it may be less degrading.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner, I just didn't think that it was a big deal."

Hearing this, he comes out of his trance tensing up. He looks very red and flushed in his cheeks, but it isn't like he's embarrassed. I've never seen him get really pissed off, and maybe I'm witnessing it now. "Not a big deal?" Brian says lowly, and it rings in my ears undeniably. "Rog, of course, it's a big deal. He literally grabbed you so hard to leave a bruise!"

Brian peers down, flipping my hand gently over to graze his thumb over the white bandaging. I can feel his finger over my bruise and touching it very softly, almost I can't feel it at all as he leans his focus over that. But it isn't pain, anything but the pain is what it feels like now surrounded by the covering bandage. "I know."

He looks so upset like his brain is filled with so many things that I can hardly tell what he's thinking now unlike any other time we're together. Reading his mind like a joke was apart of us, but it's so unsettling to see him falling apart. All because of me.

I tap his cheek a couple of times, causing him to peer back up at me and I rest my palm on his jawline fakely smiling despite the tension. "But am I sad? Nope. Let's just get over it." I poke my lips up and expect a kiss for a few seconds until I realize that there is no smile on his face, he isn't inching any closer, but it just looks as if he got more emotions tucked away. Ouch.

Instead, he takes his hand away from my own, leaving it rested there on his knee.

Brian's pained voice is now the only sound in the room, "Why aren't you as, or even more upset about this as I am?"

I'm trying not to be. That's the whole point and if you knew how much it's actually killing me it would kill you too.

"Why would I be?"

"There's no way you could've been expecting that. I don't know why you're treating it as if you don't care-"

"The point is that it's fucking over with, okay?!" I snap suddenly, feeling at my breaking point of keeping everything inside just boiling over the edge. Brian goes stiff after my response, and I'm even surprised with myself that it came out all at once. But that doesn't make me stop even for a moment when grabbing onto his knee for a sense of security.

It causes a sharp painful reaction in my bruise combined with my bones but I refuse to stop gripping Bri so tightly.

"It's not like I wasn't expecting it at all. it's not- it's not like I could ever control if he was passed out, drunk, or sober ever and I faced the consequences on all sides!"

I gesture at my wrist, shakily tensing at the very point of crying, "Of course I was expecting this, like every other single time it happened to me. Sometimes it was like my body was just used for his sick pleasure."

Memories spill in and not one good or enjoyable one comes from any recent year. But I find the very last good memory we had come back to me from years ago, the day I finally got his letter on my wrist after he had three of my own, I was so happy. There wasn't anything wrong at that point but Cory was taken from me. His personality just went out the window and soon my goosebumps on certain parts of my skin turned to bruises and marks that he claimed to be accidental.

Now my tears are actually falling, and once realizing this a while profusely trying to make it stop but the thoughts of what he's done are getting to my head again. It's so unfair.

I choke out a strained apology along with sudden curses of embarrassment that I let myself over-react like this.

But Brian grabs my hand in his to take my hands away from my stained cheeks. I try to pull them away, but even though he isn't holding me tight enough I stay put once seeing him try to talk to me as I sniffle relentlessly. The tears fall down from my eyes once again. This isn't my proudest moment, I absolutely hate crying in front of people when it's an emotional matter.

Nothing but a hushed whisper he says, "You do care as much as I do, don't you?"

Now I find every reason to care even though I was trying not to, I can't hide it anymore obviously. I simply nod at the complexity of his sentence, letting Brian throw his arms around me. He pulls me close into his torso allowing me to sit comfortably in his lap with my face in his hair. But his hair becomes wet once I start sobbing again letting all my emotions out.

He mumbles something about being able to cry, how it's alright. I can hardly hear him though with my rapid breaths and weeps in the comfort of his warmth. I actually told Brian everything, more than I ever told Freddie about my relationship with Cory. But Bri isn't getting up to go seek for the guy or pacing in anger, he's here as I melt in my own realization.

His chest though begins to bounce slightly against mine, so I can only assume that he may as well be crying too. But so softly, maybe trying not to let me notice. But I can hear it with his mouth close to my ear drawing out-breaths after every word of his.

I finally relax more, being able to breathe properly and also be brought to perfectly hear him talking.

"I had no idea, love. I'm so sorry you had to go through that. Especially for that long, the shit you put up with. You didn't deserve it."

"I somehow put up with it and still believed everything was fine," I play with Bri's curls glancing over as Pinny's cage as he starts to dig into the specs of the fake dirt in his cage. I breathily laugh. Brian pulls away, looking back at his hedgehog then grinning at me. He wipes off the spare tears before leaning in for a deep kiss now. Like the one, I was previously waiting for. He softly hums into my kiss before stopping. "How?"

I lean my head closer into his palm, closing my eyes feeling the headache from the sobbing begin to take over my head all at once from the right side up. "He said he loved me. I was just- gullible I guess."

Brian sighs, "Are you okay?" Pecking my cheek again with a need to meep me in his arms again undeniably. And I feel safer here, and I'm happy there's now no pain in my ass to focus on Chrissie, or Cory, or getting here at a certain time just to be here in this position with him. Now I can be here for as long as I want until he gets annoyed at least.

His question makes me think when it shouldn't be too difficult. I don't know where I'm at. With Brian I know I'm happy, but with the accompanying thoughts of my life with Cory, it's hard to really set my mind on one option...

I look back at Pinny, then at Brian again.

"I will be."

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For those thinking, "This is too short for her liking", there is a part two chapter so go read that. ♡

-Abbigale