felt alone in his arms; E.D

0.27

a u t u m n

so it turns out i wasn't pregnant and my period just came late and a huge part of me was happy for it, i mean like ethan says we aren't responsible for kids yet but a small section of me wishes i was, a small section of me has always wished i was pregnant.

i laid in bed with ethan, sprawled on top of his as he laid a sleep, i stayed up texting people on my phone instead of sleeping like i did most nights.

michelle was currently over again, sleeping in graysons room as per usual. ever since she came around i always thought things would be different but they aren't, if anything i have just gained a new best friend which is very rare of me because i think i have severe trust issues.

i could here their soft giggles in the back ground as i sighed and cuddled my head into the crook of ethans neck.

i really wish ethan was awake right now, i need someone to talk to but he wasn't so i continued to text Lacey on my phone.

time ticked away and before i knew it, it was 3:27 am and i was yet to sleep, grayson's room was quiet, the house was peaceful for the first time in ages. i looked at ethan and kissed his cheek and began to move off of him, his hand grasped my wrist and pulled me back down. i shook my head and told him i had to go. his left eyes opened slightly as his vision adjusted.

"where are you going?" he frowned slightly at the idea of me leaving. i placed a soft kiss on his lips and then sat up.

"no where don't worry" i leaned back onto him and cuddled into him "E?"

a soft hm left his mouth, the soft humming ringing my ear drums.

i paused for a second and looked at him, "would you have been mad if i was pregnant?"

he stopped for a second and though then shook his head. i really wanted a kid but i genuinely don't think he wants one or ever will, he's the type of guy that would rather have an independent life, somehow he just fitted me into his schedule. a small sigh circulated the air  even though he said he wouldn't be mad i knew he would have been disappointed and he wouldn't exactly be happy straight away.

ethan's eyes closed and i was able to slip away from his grasp, i quickly went to the toilet and washed my hands. my eyes caught contact with themselves in the mirror which caused an instant sigh from me, with michelle being around i've felt a whole lot less confident and maybe it's the fact that's she's gorgeous or maybe it's the fact that she has all of grayson's attention i don't know but it bothered me a lot and it was such a dumb thing to be bothered about. my hands ran over the silky towel as i exited the room and looked through the creek of gray's door, a little light shining onto G's face as he sat on his phone. his eyes quickly turned to the door and i scurried away to sit on the couch on the living room.

"hey autumn" his voice was groggy from lack of sleep "you okay?"

i nodded my head and smiled, signalling for him to come sit down beside me. i loaded up the wii and put on mario kart.

a soft giggle left his mouth as he grabbed the other remote. we began to race each other on the game, laughing quietly and jokingly hitting each other now and then, we knew the sun would be coming up soon but we were having fun and we needed some time together where there weren't no michelle's or ethan's around. my eyes focused a lot on the screen trying to get past grayson on the match. as the torment came to an end he won and i let out a little grunt and giggled as i rested my head on his shoulder.