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Chapter 23

"Welcome to château Bennett," Bonnie swings the front door of her apartment open as soon as I climb the last step. She must have been waiting by the door ever since I rang for her to let me into the building.

She looks like she walked right out of the 50's movie - her wild, bushy hair is framing her chiseled face, her tiny curls playfully bouncing on her shoulders, better part of her body is covered in silky purple robe, while her feet are tucked comfortably inside of soft, fluffy slippers. The only thing she's missing is a pencil cigar between her lips and a feather boa around her neck.

I, on the other hand, look like a complete and utter mess, since Bonnie chose to live on a 5th floor in a building with no elevator. That explains her amazing ass, though.

"There are some M&M's on your right, a year supply of donuts on your left, and my liquor cabinet is screaming to be used like a 17th century virgin in love with a man she can't have!" she takes my bag from me, my very light bag, filled only with necessities, and drops it on the floor behind the door. I walk in - there really is a bowl of M&M's on her counter - and she closes the door behind me, looking at my bag stiffly. "If you have one of your pantsuits in there, I'm sending it back to the 90's where it belongs. It's time you got some new clothes, one you actually like."

"What makes you think I don't like my clothes?" I take one candy from the bowl and pop it into my mouth.

"Oh come on, you wore those ugly grandma clothes just because Matt's mom said that's how young, professional women are supposed to dress. As if she would know anything about that," Bonnie rolls her eyes, shuddering at the thought of Matt's mom. She had seen her only once or twice in her life and declared her the walking, talking epitome of evil. I admit, Matt's mom is a hard woman to handle, but I don't know that evil is the right word. "But more importantly," she squints at me, "Did I just see you eat an M&M?"

I look at her with a confused look, maybe even a little bit startled because Bonnie is very serious when it comes to her candy. "Well, you basically pointed them out, so I thought you're offering.." I make an excuse for myself.

"No, I was, I just never thought you would accept," she crinkles her nose. "I didn't even know you consume food before noon and after 6 pm." She makes me sound like a gremlin on a very strict diet.

"I eat a bagel everyday before work. One of those big, greasy ones from Central Park," I admit.

"What!?" she exclaims, taking a step towards me for dramatic effect.

"It feels so incredibly good to take that off of my chest," I groan, leaning against the kitchen counter, even though it's incredibly uncomfortable for my back. "I don't know what came over me when I said 'me neither' to Matt's crazy 'I don't eat breakfast' policy. Who doesn't eat breakfast? It's the most important meal of the day! Waffles and pancakes and bacon," my mouth starts watering, "Or at least cereal!"

At first, she can't seem to close her mouth, confused and surprised by my confession. But then she pulls her lips into a long, thin line. "Well, good," she crosses her arms over her chest, raising one of her eyebrows at me - the tip is so pointy, probably to achieve ultimate sassiness. "Because the first rule in the Bennett household is that you gotta have breakfast. My fridge is mostly empty, though, so you're free to fill it with your smoothie, tofu shit, or whatever," she shrugs.

I let out a cheerful laughter. "I'll keep that in mind, even though I don't have my smoothie maker with me."

"Well, when are you planning to get the rest of your stuff from Matt's apartment?" she comes closer to me and places her elbows on the counter, close enough to the M&M bowl, so she can munch on her morning candy goodies.