My Friendship Journey pt 2
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Middle school, like high school, was another world for me.
The school my brother and I went to wasn't as great as it was cracked up to be. Though it was all one campus, it was split into two sides: The Honors Side and the Other Side. The Honor Side was full of spoiled, stuck-up jits that think they're a whole lot smarter than they really were, whereas the Other Side students were treated as weeds. Their side started class a half hour earlier and they had it way more strict than ours did.
I ended up having a long-arse, annoying summer project prior to going in that I didn't do, so that impacted my marks in language arts for majority of the first quarter. My classmates were just as I expected: young, excited party animals that hyped up school so everyone could enjoy going even when we didn't want to.
No one really bothered me, but that didn't mean I felt good at school. I didn't have any friends for more than half my sixth grade year. And the few people that spoke to me were as plastic as they come.
Kai stopped visiting us for a long time.
I spent my days alone, reading books and using my phone. It wasn't all that bad though. Solitude, I mean. Sure, I felt lonely sometimes, but it was normal. I was okay.
But then, a boy instantly dropped into my life. I'll call him Calvin. He was so talkative and annoying and nothing I was used to; he was an extrovert. I tried my best to evade him, to ignore him, but he was persistent. So much in fact, that I gave in and started talking to him because he didn't know when to give up.
A few days in, he managed to get my phone number and my consent to be around me every day. My need to prevent him from feeling bad or offended was to blame. He wasn't that bad at first, but damn was that boy annoying as hell. He know almost every girl on the Honor Side and had more than fifty friends. He was no jock, just a proud, chatty, animal-obsessed guy that happened to obtain a level of clout I could only dream of reaching. The entire school didn't know him, but a good amount of people did.
I didn't like being introduced to his friends, but I forced myself to. I didn't like having to open my mouth other than to eat or confirm my attendance, but I did. Nevertheless, Calvin was my friend and over time I came to accept the fact.
There were times where he would leave me by myself to talk to his numerous friends, but I didn't mind. What I didn't like though was his calling my phone every other day and staying on the line for two hours at a time. Life at home got hard for me with the arguments, my fading level of tolerance and my dad ruining everything. I hardly ever told about my personal life, but I was driven to a point where I had needed to talk to someone. I felt like my brain was going to explode, keeping everything bottled up inside for so long. So, I did it. I texted him my regards and my thoughts. Sadly, nothing good cane of it. I could tell just by how dull his responses were that Calvin couldn't give a damn about me. If what I had to say didn't involve him in any way, it didn't matter at all. This I knew, but I had just hoped...just thought fondly of him for the moment for my own comfort. He was generally self-absorbed, but that time, he was the only friend I had.
I never talk to my family about anything because I would just be a burden. My half siblings are adults with full lives of their own. I would be thoughtlessly selfish to express my sentiments to them. Not that they really associate themselves with me or do that much for me anyway. Besides, that would be very awkward and difficult to do. Many times, I feel like no one cares. I don't wanna be that clingy little sister that checks up on them and goes to them. I'm sure they'd prefer I leave them alone. They have plenty of friends. There is no where I fit in. But, to continue....
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