Within You

four.

Dinner went by swiftly. "You ready? We can go to Santa Monica?" He suggests with a sly smile. It was past eleven so the beach was going to be lively. I looked at him as he took my handed "Yeah we can go," I tell him, excitedly. The night seemed to fly by. To my dismay, I did not want it to. Cody is heading back to Rancho on Tuesday. We don't know when we'll be able to see each other again.

Cody thanked the waiter and the hostess as we exit the restaurant. It's a cold night. "Shit," I whisper to myself, thinking that Cody wouldn't hear that. "Here," he responds in a low husky tone. He takes his bomber jacket off and places the enormous coat over me. "I also have some shoes in the car for you, if you need to change your heels, uh, Lex told me to have them there." He anxiously admits with a smile, twirling me and then placing his arm around me.

"Oh, so you conversed with Lexie?" I question him, giving him a playful nudge while he opens the car door. I slid into the passenger seat and watched him as he swiftly jumped into the driver seat. "Yes, I conversed with Lexie. I wanted to make sure this date would be perfect and what person knows you better? By the way, those ugly checkered vans you've had since high school are in the back seat."

"Lex knows me best," I quickly answer, shrugging my shoulders and placing my favorite vans on my feet. I smiled. This bitch, I thought to myself. Cody grabbed my hand and held it close to his warm body. We sat in silence for a while, the stillness made me think of the time we lay on his balcony after draft day.

*Flashback*

There were several stars above us, each one of them must have its own specific meaning. I lay there trying to count each and every one of them, but I couldn't. Cody took my hand and held it close to his body, prompting me to look at him. His gorgeous smile grew and he just look back at the stars. I can tell he was incandescently happy, he was drafted into his dream team. Finally, he broke the silence.

"So have you been to Santa Monica?" He questions, a little bit louder than the previous question. "Ky?"

I shook my head and looked at him. "I'm fine..." My answer gave him a puzzled look and I realize it was a quick drive to the beach. "I'm sorry, I have been to Santa Monica. I love walking the promenade. We would have to come again during the day."

"How's the nightlife?" Cody nervously questions, pulling into the pier parking lot. He let out a heavy sigh as he turned off the ignition. "Looks kind of creepy, are you sure you want to be here?"

I giggled, stepping out of the vehicle. Cody followed me out the car and we stood in front of the hood. "Are you sure, Ky?" I continued laughing, grabbing onto his waist, and pulling him close. "Relax, Lex and I have been here together. It's fine. Enjoy yourself and let loose." I stand on my tippy toes to give him a kiss.

"I trust you then," he admits, kissing me once again.

He pulled up to the ugly dorm. There were a couple of people passed out on the lawn and a few others stumbling into the building. "I actually liked Santa Monica," he admits, his voice trailing off.

"Do you have to go back?" I whisper, laying my head on his shoulder. I avoid looking at his face. I can hear the heavy sigh exiting his mouth. Cody kisses the top of my head and does not say a word for a couple of minutes.

He plants another kiss at the top of my head. "I wish I didn't have to go..." He quietly admits, I can tell he's trying to hold in his tears. "I'm only two hours away so always know you can go up to Rancho to see me, even if it's not game day okay? I'll come by before I leave on Tuesday. After your practice I'll be there."

"Baby, I think I have a game on Tuesday, but still stop by..." My voice breaks, I don't want to cry in front of him, but I can't help it. I can feel the tears quickly rolling down my face as face the passenger window. "I got to go," I mutter, looking away from him. "Ky..." His husky voice calls.

"Kylie, look at me..." He adds, grabbing my hand. I look at him with a teary film in my olive green eyes. I shrugged my shoulders, letting out a discouraged chuckle. "I'm looking at you Cody." I huff, keeping my eyes locked on my manicured hands. "How are we going to do this?" I questioned, my voice cracks at every word. I tried to hold back the tears, but I could not... I let out a quiet sob.

"Cody," I let out a shaky laugh. "Cody, I know that we have not been together for long and I know we were best friends back in the day. I just feel..."

"Sad," He quickly states, staring at me and grabbing my hand, placing it in his. "It's going to be hard as hell, Ky. I promise you though, it'll be worth it in the end. I promise you, okay? Trust me." I give him a reassuring nod as he presses his forehead against mine. "Yes, okay," I tell him.

"I love you, you are so beautiful."

"I... love... you..." I choked out. He reaches for my lips, slowly kissing me. Savoring every last moment we have left together. Cody places his large hands on my face. I ended up placing my arms around his neck, bringing myself closer to him. My fingers run through his hair and breathlessly, we finally pull away from each other.

"I'll try to come by, I promise," Cody reassures before I exit the car. I nod, giving him one last kiss. I exit the car, trying not to look back at him. I enter the ugly building and walk up the two flights of stairs to my floor. For once, the dorm is booming with a loud bass and there aren't drunks trudging the halls.

I walk down the quiet hallway and up to my wooden door. I unlock it slowly, in case Lexie was asleep. I gently push the door open, peaking my head first to double check. Luckily, she is and I silently change out of my dress into my sweats and a cropped tee shirt. I let out a gentle sigh, crawling into my cool bedsheets.

It is way too quiet, which makes me feel worse. I lay there staring up at the ceiling with tears in my eyes. This is going to be tough, way too tough.