Dreams in the form of Words

The Beach: Stars Across the Sea

Why would they bring me here if all they'll let me do it move from our room to the kitchen? Surely this can't be fun for anyone...

The sun was long gone from the sky, but the salty breeze lingered in the air, leaving me with chills. Savannah and Alice, the two who used to be my best friends, sat on a bench across the porch. They were both fangirling about some hot guy, but I didn't see the appeal. He just looked like any other thirty year old dude.

I was sitting alone, like normal. Ever since we got here, it was mostly me keeping myself company. My parents wouldn't let me go anywhere without then after the incident, so I told Sav and Alice they could go have fun without me.

They jumped on the idea and haven't asked me to go out with them since.

I tucked my thick, messy braid into my jacket as I pulled the good over my good. The fabric muffled the sound of the waves, but only barely.

This beach trip was originally Sav's idea. She was the one who found the house and got all of our parents on board with the idea, but now, it's different. I'm merely a backround character in their adventure.

"I'm going to bed." Alice yawns, standing up and rubbing her back. "Goodnight, Rose."

I blink. My name sounds so foreign coming from her mouth. What happened to the nicknames they had for me? Why didn't I hear them anymore?

"Yeah, sleep well, Rose." Sav said, following Alice inside the house. Now, it was just me. Again.

My mother stepped out of the door seconds later.

"Why don't you come inside? Everyone is going to bed."

"Okay,"

I shared a room with my older brother, who was only a year older than me. He rarely seemed to look at me these days. Maybe it's because of the guilt.

I got into the single bed in the corner of the room. I assumed Julian was already asleep, so I stayed silent. There was gauze on the table beside him.

"Huh," I said, wondering what happened to him.

"What?" He mumbled, hearing me.

I put two and two together and sighed.

"I heard about what happened to Garrett. Was that you?"

"Yeah. My hand is all busted up from his face."

"I thought you two were friends."

"Not anymore." He says, like it's shameful. "Not after what he did to you."

"He didn't do anything to me,"

"He fucking did." Julian spits. "He knew about you. I should've been with you, at home, I could've stopped him from giving it to you-"

"Just stop." I order. "It was my own fault. Let's face it, you being there wouldn't have changed anything. I'm still here, am I?"

I pull the covers up to my chin.

"Rose?" My brother says through the dark.

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry."

"For?"

"Leaving you with him. I felt so shitty when Mom called me saying you were in the hospital. I just- I-" He pauses. "I know I would've done something if I just knew."

I close my eyes and turn on my side.

"It's fine I guess, if you really think that."

"I do."

"Hm."

I decided sleep was better than whatever this was.

************************************

Except it wasn't. Somehow, sleep was worse. Sleep was so bad that I couldnt even obtain it. The inky black was all that surrounded me.

I need to get out.

I checked the clock. It was almost one. I had plenty of time to go out and be back before everyone woke up.

I used my hands to find the front door, and simply walked out. No one cared enough to follow me.

I didn't have shoes. Just my phone and the giant shirt and boxers I "slept" in.

The beach was not far away. I was there within a minute, and I could feel the sand between my toes as I walked through the overgrown path to the shore.

The stars were endless across the sea, bouncing off the water and brightening the sky even more. The moon was nearly blinding. Behind me, lights from hotels and beach houses littered the view, but in front of me was a vast expanse of pure loneliness.

But that was just what I could see.

I walk near the water, the cold waves brushing past me as the go in and out. I'm not paying attention to where I'm going; more like where my feet are leading me. It's either go out into the ocean and never look back, or hover by the possiblity but never truly follow through.

Julian would never forgive himself if I did, so this had to be good enough.

"Hey!"

I wonder how far I'd have to swim to be surrounded by the sky, and the stars alone.

"You!"

"Huh,"

I'm not alone here. How is that... This place is so quiet, so isolating. Was I actually found? I wonder if they were actually looking.

"Are you okay?"

A boy. A boy my age.

"What?"

"Are you deaf? You're walking out here all alone. It looked like you were about to run off or something."

"Oh," Was he wrong though? "No."

"You're not okay?"

"No. I'm fine. I'm not going to run away or anything."

"Uh-"

Another person ran up to us.

"Who's this?" They ask. Their voice is calm, but not calm like the waves.

"I don't know man, She won't say much."

"Thanks for asking, but I'm fine." I start to leave, but the new guy follows. It's strange being the one in front for once.

"You want to sit around the bonfire with us? It's just me, Dyaln, and Lincoln."

"No," I mumble, my head dizzy.

"C'mon,"

"Dude, just leave her be." The first guy says. I assume he's Dylan.

"Just for a couple minutes? I'll even walk you to your house after if you want."

I smile, or do something like it. He seems too happy to spend time with me. If only he knew that I'm nothing special. Being quiet doesn't always mean interesting.

"Okay."

He grins, throwing his arm around my shoulders and pulling me close to him. I stumble over my own feet as he leads me to the fire.