Impenetrable Heart | The Oneshot Collection

Cher Ami, Cher Ami

     A/N- Okay so I started this before the last story, but just now finished it (I deleted most in the beginning because it went off-topic) so I apologize for how long it is. I thought that we were due for some closure between John and Laf. Attached is one of the photos I drew based on this! You can find the others on my Instagram @ a_random_voyager (link is in my bio). Also! TW! This chapter alludes to John's suicide attempt and past suicidal ideation multiple times. If you are sensitive to this, please do not read. Take care your yourselves! <3

     ...

     "Wait, Laf dropped off what?"

     John stared wide-eyed at the feeble brown box in Alex's hands, the words photos scribbled unsteadily in sharpie on the side.

     "He said it was a box of polaroids, he couldn't stay long enough to tell me what of, though," Alex frowned, setting down as he placed the box gingerly in his lap.

     "If they're what I think they are," John said, tucking his legs underneath him. "Then they're from my freshman year."

      John chuckled as a look of realization dawned on Alexander's face, accompanied by a wave of giddiness- likely to see what John truly had been like back then. He handed the box to John, nearly bouncing off the couch in anticipation.

     "Well let's open it up!"

     "Hold your horses."

     John couldn't help but smile, it had been years since he'd seen the pictures. When he and Laf shared a dorm their freshman year, Laf carried around an old polaroid camera, taking pictures whenever he saw fit. Unsurprisingly, he saw it fit quite often, which made for many, many photos. He lifted the flap slowly, taking a breath.

     "Holy shit-"

     Alex gawked at the amount of pictures in the box, nearly overflowing with film.

     "Don't get too excited," John held a photo gently between his fingers. "A lot of these are duds."

     He showed Alex the photo- of which was a dark brown screen with light leaking from the upper right corner. He tossed it gently on the coffee table.

     "That's what most of these are. Laf hated throwing them out."

     The two sifted through photos, tossing aside ones that had never developed or were impossible to distinguish. Once they finally began to hit the good photos, however, Alex wasted no time picking them out.

     "Oh my god look at you!" He cooed, gazing at the photo. John shook his head, laughing.

     "I'm afraid to ask."

     When Alex finally parted with the photo, John was surprised to see a photo of him and Laf, very early into their freshman year. He smiled, remembering the day well.

     "That was our first track meet," he held it up to the light. "Coach took that picture for us."

    John gazed at the picture, a bright young Laf and John grinning wildly back at him. The two were perched on a rock, John essentially sitting on top of the other while he held up a peace sign.

     "Is Laf wearing a bow?"

     "It was a headband," John chuckled, setting the picture down. "Back then his hair was short enough he got flyaways to the moon and back."

     "I never knew he did track too," Alex said, picking out more photos. "He's never mentioned it."

     "After I got booted he quit. Until then we had done track for years, so I was surprised he let it go so quickly."