Squidward's Fucking Pussy

The Conflict

Squidward had always hated Patrick Star, but never as much as today. Today, Patrick's complete lack of common sense and his outstanding stupidity drove our angry cephalopod friend over the edge. It had started when Patrick came into Squidward's house uninvited. Normally this was something Squidward had come to expect due to the unpredictable nature of his wacky neighbors, but this was the first time Patrick alone had entered his neighbors house without his porous friend, Spongebob Squarepants. Since Squidward recognized this as a routine by now, he went on with the usual "get out of my house" speech that he was known for. However, rather than Patrick spouting something nonsensical, he'd approached Squidward's hostility very arrogantly, saying that he could be there if he wanted. In a very bold move, Squidward threatened to call the police and have Patrick sttrdyrf. Patrick could see the anger that Squidward was going through, but rather than backing down, Patrick thought it would be 'funny' in his eyes to provoke the man even more. At that moment, Patrick dashed to the upper floor of Squidward's house, and started sexually assaulting Squidward's clarinet. Squidward had raced up to the room and demanded that Patrick stop or he would get physical. At this point, Patrick was trying to stop, but he didn't have the will to do it. "Patrick, please, you've done me enough emotional damage, please just leave me alone for now", says a very disgruntled Squidward. "I can't let go of the clarinet. I don't know why, I physically can't stop firmly grasping it", says Patrick, struggling to let the words even leave him. At this moment, Squidward can easily tell that Patrick has no more control of the situation and, against his better judgement, helps him remove himself from the clarinet.