The Letter Which Remain Unburnt...

CHAPTER 5

We were given leave for a day, which was a good time for me to talk to Jinyoung, but I don't know how.

So before that I thought that I should discuss things with my members first as it's better than hiding things from them and that way whenever I would need their help I can ask them.

Of course they are going to be so angry and Youngjae is going to feel so bad but it will have to do for now. I am ready to take all of their anger as long as I get to have Jinyoung by my side for forever.

It was 4:00 AM in the morning, yes I know what you guys are thinking. It was 4 A.M when I decided to knock at everyone's door to wake them up except Jinyoung's. You see I didn't tell them beforehand that today is leave. They still think we have a schedule. I am so dumb an I not. They will be so angry at being woken up so early but I would love to see their happy faces after knowing that they have a whole day rest. Okay back to topic.

I woke everyone up. Of course everyone was cranky but no one complained except giving glares. I looked sheepishly at them but then I started speaking when all of them were sitting down.

"I asked you guys to come out not because of the official schedule purpose but I would need your help" I spoke.

"Help with what?" Mark asked

"I need help with Jinyoungie. You see I love him. Yes you heard me right. I love him and not platonically but romantically and yes I am gay." I said.

"We already knew that so what's new?" Jackson said.

"Wait what did you mean by we already knew?" I asked him

"What he mean is all of already knew that you love him as much as he loves you." Bambam said

"Yes you guys are the only who are not aware of your love for each other and with yourself ignorance you have tortured all of us a lot too. Do you know how many times all of us wanted to push you guys in one room and tell you guys to fuck like bunnies in heat?" Yugyeom replied to which he got hit on his head by Youngjae for his language.

"So you guys don't have any problem with me being gay? Doesn't it makes you feel uncomfortable?" I asked nervously.

"Hyung you know in this whole room I am the only one who is straight. Four of us are gays, one is Bi and the one who is sleeping I don't know his sexual preference but he sure as hell is not straight so yes we don't have problem." Youngjae said while others nodded.

I felt guilty for not knowing about my members this deeply and being stuck on my own problems so I apologized to them to which dismissed my apology saying that I don't need to apologize something which is not even my fault.

"So what do you want to talk about? What do you need help with?" Mark asked again.

"Ah yes. You see I told you that I love Jinyoung but I was not sure about Jinyoung feeling for me so I tried to ignore my feeling for him. But I didn't know that me ignoring my feelings and not sorting them out could hurt someone really badly. So yesterday when Jinyoung went out I went after him too. Not because I wanted to but because I saw him looking very sad and upset. So I started following him. When I was following him He put his in the pockets and bring out his phone while he was doing so he dropped something. When I got near the object I saw that it was papers and not one but a bunch of them. When I read the starting I noticed that those were addressed to me so I picked them up hide away somewhere to read them. When i finished reading I started crying Coz i had cause him a lot of pain unknowingly and I want to stop causing him. But when I reached the end I didn't know what to do except crying. He wrote that he want to leave the group so that he won't be in pain anymore because of me. Even though he loves singing more than acting he is willing to give it up but I don't want him to leave ever. I don't know what to do I just really don't know what to do." I said crying cause I was still scared that Jinyoung would leave me for forever.

"After reading I started looking for him but when I was looking for I got a call from Director. He was sounding angry. So when I reached there I saw Jinyoung coming out of the room and I knew that I am late in stopping him from leaving the group and that was why JYP director called me. He scolded me for not knowing the reason Jinyoung want to leave the group for which I actually knew. Jinyoung also said that he would be emptying the dorm today and practice timing would be different. However, when I was leaving director's room he advised me to start acting again. At first, I didn't understand but then I got what he meant. He said so, so that I can have some time with Jinyoung to convince him to not leave the group in JYP's case and me in my case. Moreover, to convince him I would need your guys help. Please help me. I don't want lose Jinyoungie. I have been stupid for a long time but now I want to make everything right so please just please help me." I kneeled down in front of all of them joining my hands which made Jackson stand up and pulled me up along with Yugyeom.

"You don't need to beg Jaebeom-ah. We would help you after all its neither his nor your fault. It's just how it was written to happen but now you have us and we will help you. Let's try stopping Jinyoung from leaving today." Mark said.

No I don't want him to be forced to stay so we need to find alternative things to convince him. We can't make more upset hyung" I said to Mark.

"Okay let's see what we can do so that Jin...." We heard some noises coming out from Jinyoung's room so we stopped talking and we saw him coming out his room. He saw all of us sitting here and raised his perfect eyebrow but then started walking towards the washroom when I spoke loudly and called Jinyoung to the group which he did come but didn't look at me which made me feel like crying but I tried my best to keep my voice normal.

"So I gathered you guys here to tell you that today we have leave for rest so you can do whatever you want to. Okay guys goodnight I am going to go back to sleep" and with everyone started moving back to their room. Everyone except Jinyoung. He was sitting there thinking deeply about we don't know but all of us left him in the living room to go back to sleep.

I Hope you guys love it. Even though this chapter is not interesting I promise next one will be better.

Stay safe everyone. 

Love you lots.