Zara || A Nigerian Lesbian

𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚎𝚕𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚗

𝚉𝙰𝚁𝙰
━━━━━━━━━▲━━━━━━━━━

To belong to someone.

That was all I had ever wanted, to be loved. I crave it-need it, desire it-more than anything else in the world. The kind of love that bonds souls. The type of love that is so deep becomes one.

I wasn't if Bella was going to be the one.

Two days passed and no word from her about our supposed date, until this afternoon. She had sent a text earlier saying to meet her at my place. I asked the security guard to let her in since I was still at work.

Knowing I had to leave soon, I began to tidy up because there was no time to waste. I won't lie; I was a bit excited. My mind kept going back to that fateful night when we bared our souls to each other intimately.

Thirty minutes later, I was pulling into the compound. I was expecting the door to be open, but it was locked. Digging for my keys, I could hear something crashing on the ground.

Once I got the key to the house, I opened the door and went in. I could hear a low moan coming from the kitchen. Slowly I dropped my belongings, my phone still in my hand, and tiptoed towards the sound. Nothing prepared me for what I was about to see.

Opening the kitchen door slightly, I froze, watching my worst nightmare unfold. The shock ripped through me, coming in with waves of fear and pain. No matter how much I wanted to look away or run, I couldn't.

Bella was on the kitchen island, legs spread apart, with Lolia's face all over her private area. With each flick of her tongue, I could feel the ground opening up to fall in. I closed my eyes, pushing the tears back, hoping this was not real. When I opened my eyes, it was not a dream-it was reality.

"Yes!" Bella screamed. "Oh. My. God. I am coming."

I couldn't control my hands' shaking, my phone fell to the ground, and I broke into sobs - making my presence known. They both snap up, and Bella's eyes lock on mine.

"Zara," she said, staring at me with wide eyes. "I can explain, it's not what you think."

"Explain what you bitch!" I cried out as tears started to fill my vision. "You are so..." My legs began to wobble, and my breathing was shallow as I tried to regain my balance. Everything was fading, but my mind kept both of them in front of me as clear as daylight. I took a deep breath, trying to relieve myself of a panic attack.

I held the door for support as Bella spoke. "We can talk about this, Zara."

I didn't want to talk. I felt like I wanted to bleach my eyes to erase this atrocity. My heart was hurting so much I felt like ripping it out. Nothing Bella said, was going to make this all go away, especially when the person she had to be intimate with was Lolia-it was torture.

I look up, and I see the smug smile on Lolia's face, and that said it all. She did want this to happen. She was enjoying the fact that I was hurting. As shocked and horrified as I was, I watched Lolia grinning and looking so convinced she had won whatever game this was.

I turn around and head towards the main door. I ran out as fast as I could. Hopeless, I turned the car on and drove out of the house. All the good times I thought I could have had with Bella, down the drain just like that.

The memories I had with Lolia, I couldn't believe she would treat me with so much hate. As I drove, the memories kept coming one by one: good and evil, love and hate, happiness, and sadness.

Why? Why, after all this? Why now? When I decided I was going to accept myself for who I was, everything wrong kept happening to me.

I pull myself together and keep driving around in circles for hours. My phone kept ringing. I didn't want to know who it was, and I didn't care. No one was going to be able to comfort me. My whole life was ruined.

Later that evening, I found my way back to my house and met Bella standing outside.

She stood there staring at me as what I saw a few hours ago came right back into my head. "Hey."

"What can I do for you?" My voice was calm, but anyone hearing me could hear the tone of disgust.

"Can we at least talk."

I shook my head in disappointment as I tried to find the strength to handle her baggage. Looking at her, or having her around me made me sick. She and Lolia had destroyed not just what we had but also how I felt about this whole love thing. I was empty.

"Zara, please. I am begging you," Bella said as she tried to hold my hand.

I snapped and pushed her away. "Don't you dare touch me!"

"It's not what you think."

"Is that so?" I ask as tears return to my eyes, threatening to pour down.

She takes a deep breath and tries to look at me. "I came over and found Lolia in your sitting room only in panties, and she came onto me. I didn't know what to do, and I wasn't thinking."

Utter silence.

"And I wasn't sure if you and I were going to work."

Then why did you come over? Why did you ask me to meet you here? Those were questions I kept asking myself.

"I wanted more from us, Zara," she spilled out, forgetting the fact that she was hurting me real bad.

"More what? I can't believe this." My eyes widened in disbelief. How did I not see all this coming? Why was I so naive? Why couldn't I know this girl for who she indeed was-evil!

She kept glaring at me, and that was when it sunk in. She wasn't here to get things back on track. The girl just wanted to get in between my legs. She wanted me to forgive her, and then cause more damage as Lolia did to me.

"Is that all you wanted to say?"

Her mouth opened wide like she wanted to say something reasonable, but she said, "I don't know what else to say. I am sorry?"

"Get out!" I shouted.

I called the security guard to escort her out because this whole charade was over. I was done.

There was nothing to hold me anymore. I lost my mother, my best friend and now, my lover. It was all over.