She's the Phenom [GxG]

Chapter 26 - Life sucks!

Chapter 26 - Life sucks! 

It sucks to be me! I wish I could just go back in time when life is a little bit less complicated.

When my only problem in life is how my father will see and love me.

It is much more easier. Not like this. 

I starting to feel like living in an aquarium and everyone is watching every move I make. 

The pressure and expectation of everyone around me starting to crawl down to my bones. 

I knew something like this will happen, but I didn't expect this much. 

I didn't expect that I need to keep going in life, living and breathing with a broken heart.

I don't know how I managed to survive this long with everything that is going on in my life. I just wish that my heart stops hurting for something that I know from the start that will never happen.

I wish I can runaway from everything and everyone, while accepting the truth that Darcelle and I will never happen. 

I hate myself for being courageous in taking a step out of the friendship zone. She's been subtly telling me I can't take a step forward, but I disregard it and pushed the button of my imagination of what if I tell her the possibility of liking her.

And that what if - scares her away.

Because after that night, after those subtle question I asked, she left the city the next day without even saying good bye.

And I hate her, I hate her for leaving just like that. I hate her, but I hate myself more that I know I couldn't hate her that long. I can't blame her, because it is my fault. 

I was told not to fall, but I still did fall for her. 

But it's just about my feeling towards Darcelle that makes my days in the past weeks a living hell. My dad came in the city and it makes my heart jump out of my rib cage because of fear. 

Fear that everything will be taken away from me. Fear that I will lose my freedom. 

But unexpectedly, it didn't happened and that makes me scared even more. 

Because my father will not be here for nothing. He will not show his face without a reason. And the way he looks at me that moment on his hotel room, I know that he know something I didn't know. 

And this scares me, because even though Ate Jessy said his presence is nothing but a routine check up it still scares me to death. 

So I push myself more. 

To forget my broken heart and to make sure that being a volleyball player still makes a good image for me and my father. 

"You know you shouldn't be too hard on yourself, right?" I heard someone say as I see a bottled water in front of me.

"It's just my usually early jog." I said sabay kuha ng bote sa harap ko.

"I know, but it's too early for you." then she seat next to me. "And it's Sunday you should be resting, right?"

Instead of answering,I just drink the water she gave me.

"You push yourself too much. And It's not even your season yet."

"We'll be joining a preseason league." I replied.

"Well, that's a good enough excuse." she said and chuckled.

I look at her. "It's the real reason." I told her

"We both know that it is not entirely true." then she meet my gaze "We both know it's because of Darcelle."