Rolling in the Deep

Part Three

Black out on the ward at 10:30pm as usual, raised a groan from the patients. Your room mate Dave looked at you confused, seeing his outline as your eyes got used to the dark. Lights out at 10:30pm every night you confirmed To be honest, as they wake you at 6am coming on shift, its probably wise to get your head down early you smiled then realised he wouldnt be able to see you. Great he huffed putting down his book and trying to move to get in his chair. Woah you called out do you need someone to help you? Have you done that on your won yet? you called over. I am fine he growled I can do it he huffed.

But despite his harsh words, you heard a whimper of desperation and disappointment, as he had to admit defeat. You pressed your call button and a male nurse appeared, Whats up swallowing you gestured to Dave He needs help transferring you said. Alright mate, Im Kevin, listen if you need anything, dont be afraid to ring the bell, thats what we are here for he laughed. I wanted to it myself he growled again One step at a time, mate ok said Kevin. What are you wanting to do? Kevin asked I need the bathroom he sighed then dropping his voice Well I did, its err too late now his head dropped and you felt his embarrassment. Laying on your side, facing away you pretended not to hear.

But your heart ached for him, another one of the clubs. You sighed. Surely there was abetter fucking way for this to go, why did losing your physical abilities always mean losing your dignity too. You found yourself crying again, every night this week you had cried yourself to sleep. You knew it was all part of the grieving process, but you had never been a crier previously and this was all pretty disconcerting. It was made all the worse by having another person present.

You buried you head in the pillow, hoping to dull the sounds of your sobs. After a while they subsided, and you began to fall asleep. Thank you for calling the nurse Dave called out to you, Thats okay you whispered back, feeling heavy and ready to sleep Are you ok? he asked you were crying, I didnt know if you needed me to call for you? he said Im fine, thank you though, and no dont worry I just need to get it all out Dave. We all do or its like a cancer, it will destroy you, if you let it you replied yawning there was silence for while then quietly you heard him again Goodnight y/n Night Dave you replied.

--

As predicted the noisy day staff, clattered their way on to the ward at 6:30 am. Ignoring the 20 or so residents all deeply sleeping. They gossiped and giggled loudly before going into the staff room for handover. 7am hit and the blinding lights blast across the unit, waking anyone silly enough to try and go back to sleep after being rudely awoken. The staff room door opened, and staff poured out, loudly saying goodbye to their colleagues. Support staff began their cleaning, clattering and banging metal bins and pushing huge mops under your bed. While nurses bullied you into a chair to eat, while they changed your sheets. Sat half dead, propped in the chair, you ate the cold toast and lumpy porridge. As a nurse plonked towels and washing items on the bed. You are having a wash? theyd ask as if it was a choice.

Sat without your glasses, you groaned. Told you you called over to Dave, who was now in a set of hospital scrubs, no hoodie in sight. You reached for your glasses but they were on the other side of the bed. Sorry Amita, you will have to wait for his identification you chuckled whats funny? Dave asked Other than the state of this breakfast he groaned pushing his tray table away. Nothing you replied Do you want the shower first or second? you asked he hadnt been made to get out into the chair this morning, but you knew he wouldnt escape the wash. Ill have one later he said You go for it he rolled over and looked to be heading back to sleep Good luck with that you called out and he turned Why? the staff will want you washed before physio and after you answered So what if I refuse? he asked You will be reminded and asked by every staff member every 2 minutes, until they break you down you replied. Fucking hell, this place is like prison he groaned pushing himself up the bed wincing with pain. Been to prison have you you chuckled No, but I reckon its got to be better than this he smiled.

Even without your glasses, you could see that and you were pleased to see a more positive face on him. what about meds? he asked Oh stupidly they come round AFTER you have washed and so you have to exhert yourself without adequate pain relief, make no sense and Ive complained a number of times you stopped yourself, you sounded like a proper Karen and decided to focus on the porridge in front of you.

Once washed and dressed you made yourself comfortable waiting for meds and the call to physio. You flipped through the magazine Amita had given you, it had barely any written sections, the majority was adverts and massive celeb pictures. Dave had taken your advice and was in the shower, he had to have Mike, one of the stronger male auxiliaries help and you were mortified for him. Reliving your own miserable experience. As you flicked through you came across an article about Taron Egerton. Amita had been right about the crush this particular actor had you under. Taron Egerton in Stunt gone wrong you read. Looking across at Daves empty bed, you held your breath. Reading it again, you looked at the pictures. There were the normal older shots from press, but at the top were two grainy shots of him being put not the ambulance, he was wearing a baseball cap and grey hoodie.

Looking at the bathroom door, it creaked open. Turning the page, your heart began to pound as Taron was wheeled out of the bathroom, he was in his own clothes now rather than the scrubs, no hoodie or cap though. It all fell into place, as you looked at him, he smiled. You okay? he asked You look like youve seen a ghost you chuckled taking a deep breath hoping you hadnt turned red a unicorn maybe? you smiled, turning back to the magazine.