Rolling in the Deep

Part 8

You lay still, enjoying the warmth and motion as his body rose and fell behind you. It had been a shock when you first realised, he was there, but you found the comforting sensation of being held, was too good to fight it. Is this ok Taron whispered as you nodded. Turn on the stop so you were facing him. His eyes had been closed but they now opened as if asking and answering all the questions you both had, your eyes flicked to each others, smiling occasionally.
Thank you you said bare audible. Taron shook his head, reaching forward he moved a stray strand of hair from your face. oh he groaned as his back complained over the movement. Without thinking you reached out and put your hand on top of his where he was rubbing at the painful spot. As your hands touched it was like an electric shock hit you, in fact it did. The static electricity from your hair along with the metal bed sent a static shock through your fingers. You pulled away in unison laughing. Breaking the sexual tension, you felt growing. He smiled down at you Shocking he joked Cheesy? he asked knowing full well it was.
You nodded but smiled Who doesnt like a bit of cheese you added, your hand moved back to the sore spot and slipped you hand up his shirt, pressing two fingers gently to the area you massaged the area. At first it hurt, and Taron gave out a gasp, but then a relieved groan as the manipulation began to soothe the area. Moving onto his stomach and pulling up his shirt to give better access, he closed his eyes. You should work here his voice was a little obscured by the pillows, but you got the gist. No thanks, its bad enough being a patient you replied.
so, when are you gonna tell us your whole story? you asked Youve heard all of ours and just saying a stunt went wrong isnt enough you added. Taron turned his head to the side and stared into the distance. I was thrown off a horse he said Fucking hated the bloody things, but I wanted to face the fear You continued the massage but moved a little, letting Taron show you where else he needed the help. Listening quietly, you knew that how important it was now to just let him talk. He spoke about always having a fear of horses and how they always seemed to pick up on it.
He had had it written into his contract after an earlier fall, that he would not ride any animal. But he had a scene where he was simply sat on one, it was already making him nervous and didnt seem happy with him on its back at all. It was exactly like before, thats what was weird, it was de ja vu, as I did a somersault, I remember thinking this cant turn out as well as it did before, not twice. The next thing he remembered was waking up in the intensive care, his Mam was visiting the set and saw it all happen. He said it was horrible for her to see what happened, but he was glad she was thereafter.
Hed been in the intensive care for a week and a private ward for four days before coming here. The specialists were being frustratingly vague about is prognosis. But he knew he had permanent spinal damage. It was how that would affect him no one knew. His face grew red and angry as he spoke, clearly things were getting to him. He had clearly really gone through it. You stopped massaging and he turned over Is that my lot? he asked My elbow isnt up to anymore you complained showing him your elbow and its limit range of motion. He ran his fingers around the elbow and lower arm. Does it hurt? he asked. Sometimes, if I lay on it or move suddenly.
Suddenly Taron holding on to your arm, pulled it moving your together as his lips hit yours making you hold your breath. Your eyes wide as he startled you, they closed as you fell into the kiss. His lips were soft, and a taste of peaches lingered as he moved back a short while Sorry he mumbled turning red Its okay you answered. But Taron was already moving into his chair and despite calling after him, he sped out of the room. You sat on the bed confused and frozen, unsure what to do. You wish Amita was here.
You climbed into your chair and followed Taron. There are few places he could have disappeared off to, so it didnt take long to spot him at the bottom of the garden. You wheeled over and pulled up next to him. Well thats a new one on me? you said quietly I have been walked out on, but never had someone use wheels you tried to joke. Taron was facing the floor, smoking a cigarette. Im sorry he said still facing the floor. I didnt mean to mess with your head he said. Its okay Taron, really you replied trying to look at him. He turned sideways his eyes flickered up to yours.
Taron, this place does stuff to you, you can be happy one minute and screaming the next you smiled reassuringly. Thank you for the hug, I needed that. Amita and I were admitted the same day and its bizarre shes got discharged and Im still here you sighed. Taron, you havent confused me, the kiss was lovely, but why did you run off? You might not be confused, but I am, and I didnt mean to drag you into my nightmare he closed his eyes, his cheeks were reddened. You place a hand on his knee Its forgotten already Taron, really. But can I ask you a favour? Talk to me, please you bent your head down looking up at Taron with a smirk. A smile slowly appeared on his lips Thank you What is there to say, my career, my life is over he rolled his eyes and looked away. He looked to be fighting his emotions.
Tell me, how is it over? you asked despite having an idea about his answer. You remembered the feeling of loss and anger when you were first told your damage was permanent. It had taken a lot of time to sink in and every little issue made you lash out in anger. Now it was Tarons turn, Come on how many disabled actors do you know, how many get the main roles the good ones, all those characters I dreamed I would play, I thought I would one day get to do, its all fucking gone, if I dont get out of the fucking contraption he spat, slapping the chair in anger.
Well have they told you that its permanent? you asked no he shook his head So then there is still everything to play for? Besides, even the experts are wrong sometimes. Worse case you are in the chair permanently, you work out a knew normal you said Sorry I know it sounds trite and cliché, but its true one step, one day at time you smiled coyly as he nodded his head. If It makes you feel better, we all feel like you do in here, weve all lost something and find it hard to see the end of the tunnel, if anyone understands what your feeling and thinking, its all of us you finished.
Why do you cry at night? Taron asked suddenly, taking you by surprise. Blinking quickly, you looked at him, his eyes were caring and genuine. Because Im alone, lonely you struggled to speak. Hating to talk about this, you were fine talking about the accident and its emotional affect on you. But the way it highlighted your complete lack of friends or family was the hardest. Taron looked confused but didnt press you further. Hearing your voice breaking as you had spoken. Your hugs are pretty good treatment for that particular problem you told him, and his smile spread further across his face.
Then as long as you need one, Im here he told her.