broken home||c.h.

33: We're just two ghosts standing in the place of you and me

A/N:
Alright, I couldn't hold it in.

I said I wasn't gonna update like usual, but hearing all this amazing news of Ashton going into his solo project made me so happy. The single is flawless and so effing raw that I'm in love.

So I decided to update this story, along with adding a new story to the works called Ghost Of You. It's the a.i. story I've been working on. There are some chapters pre-typed but dk when I'll get the rest out.

(For those who haven't seen the vid yet, I linked it above!)

Anyways, on with the chapter!

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August 2018

Molly's P.O.V

I don't know how to feel. For the past year-ish, I've felt more down and less motivated to do anything.

I literally did nothing on my birthday because I didn't even motivation to celebrate it.

I felt like I've lost sense of life. In the sense of that I felt like I was rebuilding myslf, and that I was able to become something bigger, but it was like as soon as I saw what I saw, it was like this old me was trying to resurface all over again. The broken, cold-hearted me was coming back.

I went through it the first time. From that time, I was hurt, I felt broken, and I didn't know what to do with my life.

This though, this one just felt so much different, but so much more painful than the first time cause it was my literal childhood best friend.

Even though it wasn't the first time, it hurt even more. At this point, I wasn't broken, I was shattered.

Basically from that night I was able to get myself off from the floor, but I moved to my couch.

Then days moving foawrd, I would either be in my room, my office, or my couch.

Notice how it's all in my condo, that's cause I never left my place. I couldn't bring myself to go into the outside world.

I feel like I've been feeling the same emotions for over a year. I haven't re-built myself again, if that even makes sense.

In this over one year since it happened, the only people I've mainly kept in contact with was Santana and Joanne.

Kate actually came a few days later and said that she wanted to stay with me so I can have some sort of company.

She's been doing her own thing, but when she came home, she was able to stay over and just be with me.

I felt so bad though because she was basically living on my couch, so I gave her some money and told her to buy an airmatress so that she can be with me in my room. I still have 'the middle' part of the room open since all I have is a chest, a nightstand, and a standing mirror next to my closet. At the same time, the bed I got is a small one so I wouldn't have to take up too much space. The bed did fit two people, so when it was just me, it felt lonely sometimes.

Having Kate with me feels like I somewhat have my life going. I mean, the first couple months, I was a wreck. Once Kate came those few days it happened, she still respected that this was difficult for me, and she let me have my space.

I just feel so lucky to have her with me so I can have that company that I had when I was with him.

It was also nice to have visits from Santana to check up on me and Joanne would come every so often to check up on me as well.

So, today I woke up like it was any other day. This time I was on my office beanbag cause I was playing around with some tunes.

So when it was around maybe November/December-ish. that's when I started writing and making some tunes on my own again.