Black Ink [Harry Styles]

Chapter 35

Nessa

Its Sunday and I have spent the last two days in a total nosedive, trying to decide what I am going to say to Harry on Monday. He hasn't contacted me. I don't blame him; he is obviously hurt and angry. I miss him. Normally we talk every day but I can't call him because I still have no idea what I am going to say.

I have been surviving on coffee, chocolate and red wine the last few days, and other than seeing a couple of clients on Friday, I have been sitting on the couch in my pyjamas, thinking about Harry. Fluctuating between being angry with him for messing everything up with his admission of falling in love with me, and fuming with myself for pushing him away and being scared to say it back.

I can't sit around here and mope anymore, so I scroll through my phone and press call.

"Hey Ness" Letty answers.

"Hi Letts. Any chance we can meet up?" I ask.

"Oh my god yes! I love my children and husband but I need to some adult time. Do you want to grab a coffee somewhere?" she asks.

"Shoreditch Grind in an hour?" I counter.

I walk into the Coffee Shop, and Letty is already there with both our coffee orders and a chocolate muffin lying ready in front of her. She of course looks beautiful and put together while I look like a bus just hit me.

"Baby girl! What is your drama?" She asks without even greeting me.

"Hey Letts" I say while grabbing a fork and spearing a piece of the muffin "you better be ready to tell me what to do, because I am a fucking mess".

I explain the whole fiasco to Letty and when I am done, I take a deep breath and turn to her, looking for her opinion.

She stares at me; mouth agape then slumps back onto her chair and is silent for a few beats, thinking.

"So he told you he loves you?" she asks

"yes"

"And you freaked out and told him to leave?"

"yes"

"But you think you love him back?" 

"yes"

"But after the fucking asshole that is Oliver, you are scared to say it back" 

"yes" I answer.

"Shit Nessa. That is some good drama" she adds.

I throw my head back and let out a huge sigh.

"I think I need to man up and tell him how I feel Letty! But we have been dating a month. People don't confess their undying love after a month, do they?" I ask.

"Ness. I'm not going to lie; it is fast but I don't think there are any steadfast rules in the game of love. You need to decide whether you are in love with Harry and then talk to him" Letty suggests.

"I know, but it's scary. I am so happy. Harry makes me so Happy; I love seeing him and talking to him. He makes me want to forget Oliver and that love and relationships eventually lead to being cheated on and lied to" 

Letty takes my hand and rests her head on my shoulder "Don't let the past stand in the way of now Ness. If you love him, tell him and take it from there".

Harry

"For fucks sake H. What is going on with you?" Jeff exclaims as we walk down the steps of our jet, onto the runway in Milan.