Things I wish I could say out loud

Emotions i dont understand

I have never felt so exhausted
I have never felt so much anguish
I have never felt such an aching I could not explain.
I yell a lot.
When I'm alone in my car on my way to work,I scream parts of the song that remind me of how I feel.
I sometimes find myself over come with emotions and just screaming.
Overwhelming.
I can feel the ache all the time.
It's always there.
Right there where the love should be.
Right next to the part of me that's missing the hell out of you.
Keeps it company I guess.
I Miss You.
Do you hear me when I say it out loud?
When I pass your house, the street I used to turn on to twice or three times a week, when I cry instantly because all the memories made on that street flood back to me.
Do you hear my pain?
It's deafening to me.
I never thought you'd mean this much to me, honestly.
I'm sorry I let it get to this point, but my love, we had so much more to give each other and you robbed me of that.
I hate you for it
But it's your right I guess.
Do you miss me?
I know you think of me.
I assume you do.
Random little meaningless contact point to me crossing your mind.
And you still wear the bracelet I gave you.
My heart yelled a little bit of victory when I heard it's still on your wrist.
Stop making me miss you.
Please.
Don't make me have to miss you.
See me
Need me
Hold me
Be with me
Please
Make me feel ANYTHING.ELSE. PLEASE
Because truthfully I don't even understand how I feel anymore.