Deepest Desire

5

Jay POV

I sit at my desk in deep thought about my next move. I was getting irritated with being ignored by Kenya. It didn't make sense considering she swore she forgave me.

"Jay?" Andre walks in. "You got a minute?"

"Yeah man, what's up?" I sit back in my seat. 

"So, you and Kenya." he says. I laugh he didn't look pleased at all. But this grown ass man has some nerve coming to me about a woman that doesn't belong to him. It made me want to fuck with his head but that's not even me. 

"What about us?"

"What's this history between you two I've been hearing about."

"I don't understand your question." I lean on my elbows. "Please, elaborate?"

"Okay." he clears his throat. "So I hear you're the reason she's having a hard time committing to me." he flat out says. I couldn't help but laugh again. 

"I mean, don't get me wrong you're a pretty cool guy I guess, but Kenya not committing to you is a you problem." I nod. "There's nothing I can do about that. All I know is, there is definitely some history between us. But I highly doubt she's taking that out on you."

"So how long ago?"

"Eight years ago." I nod. "Any other questions?"

"Have you fucked her?" 

"That sounds so... barbarous. To answer your question, no. I did not fuck her." I shake my head. It shouldn't have triggered me to see relief on his face but it definitely did. 

"Okay then." he pushes away from the other side of the desk and was proceeding to leave. 

"I made love to her. Over and over and over again." I smirk. He slowly turns around. A stern look on his face. "Does that answer your questions?" without another word, he turns and leaves. I couldn't help but laugh again. It feel good as fuck to say that. I sip my coffee shaking my head. That shit made my day. 

"Jay Oliver?" I say into the phone as my thoughts were interrupted 

"I'm sorry." Lauren cries into the phone. I sigh, shaking my head.

"Lauren, I can't keep doing this with you. You've got to stop calling me." 

"But Jay, you are the one who did something not me. So how is it fair that I have to be the one that is hurting?"

"Look, I don't know what you want me to say Lauren. You left without trying to talk the situation out. I love you and I care about you and that's why we have to stop doing this. I haven't been happy in a long time and I just don't want to keep hurting you okay? Please just stop contacting me. You're making this whole thing more difficult than it needs to be." I sigh. "I know you hate me right now and I hate myself too. But, I can't do this with you Lauren."

"So that's it? All for that stripper?"

"It has nothing to do with Kenya." not completely anyways. 

"You love her don't you?" she sobs. "You love her more than you've ever loved me. Tell me why?"

"It's just..." I take a deep breath. "You're a great woman. I know that whatever man you end up with is going to be blessed to have you. But that man isn't me Lauren. I'm sorry." I hang up. 

 I felt awful that Lauren left the way she did. I wasn't expecting her to be ready to try to work things out hours later. But I don't think the timing could not have been more perfect. I told her to pack her things whenever she landed. Since then it's been constant contact from different numbers and accounts letting me know she's not giving up and will be waiting for me with 'open arms'. I couldn't control her actions but I definitely have did and said what I had to in hopes of evidence if Kenya asks for proof I cut things off with Lauren.