catradora one-shots

self doubt

tw//self-loathing

Catra stares out of the window from her and Adora's shared room. The sun is setting and you can see all kinds of creatures soaring through the sky, finding their way back home. The one creature she expects never arrives though. It's been a full week since Adora left on a mission, and Catra has grown quieter with each passing night. Her lover should arrive any day now, but is still nowhere to be found. Her last report was from Dryl, stating that she would be heading home.

Catra's POV

When night falls, I make my way to the end of our bed, hoping that she would come through the double doors at any second. I lay there, staring directly forward, with no emotions displayed on my face. My mind begins to wonder off to the events of the recently terminated war. I remember my days fighting against Adora, taking out their armies, leaving their families waiting. They found themselves in a situation like mine, but they wouldn't see their loved ones walking through.

I think back on all of the lives I indirectly finished, the people of Salineas that were left without a home.

I think back on the way I treated those close to me, Scorpia, Entrapta. We've made up since then, but I cant help but think they will never truly forgive me. I wouldn't either, i was horrible, not only to them.

The Princess Alliance, I always had such hatred for them, but when push came to shove, they took me in almost immediately. They forgave my flaws, accepted my change, and helped me through it.

Most notably, I hurt Adora. No matter how many times she's told me that she never hated me, the picture of her eyes as she broke the portal pierce my soul, and show nothing but hatred. I've fought with her, and I've hurt her emotionally. I stayed away from her for 3 years, simply because I couldn't word my thoughts. I made us be apart for 3 years, when none of this could have happened, and we could have been happy from the start, or at least, she could've been happy.

What if she isn't coming back? What if shes thinking these same things, and deciding to stay away. She could be on Mara's ship on her way to another planet for all i know.

Unknowingly, I make my way to the closet, taking Adora's jacket which she had left behind. I put it on, and start heading for the balcony.

This will make it easier for the both of us, I whisper to myself as I get ready to land on a tree, and make way for Adora's happiness.

Right as I am about to jump off, I hear the door opening and quickly hide under the railings.

"Catra?" I hear Adora say. She repeats my name several times, after she notices I'm not there, she starts to panic.

Is this the right choice? Is she freaking out because her jacket isn't there? Or is it because of me?

I slowly make my way back into the balcony, and into the room. As soon as Adora sees me her eyes light up and she runs over to me, engulfing me in a hug.

"I missed you so much", she whispers into the hug, "I wasn't supposed to take this long, but Swift Wind got stuck in a tree and got injured, so we stopped in a village nearby to help him- why are you wearing my jacket that you oh-hate-so-much" She suddenly stops herself and asks.

She seems pretty cheery, I'd hate to bring her mood down because of my own insecurity. This is a conversation we can have later. "I missed you a lot i guess, and your jacket has been keeping me warm."

Um yea sorry this ended so abruptly, I was going to continue it but decided against it because it would get very angsty and that's not what we want. Sorry for taking so long to update and then coming ba