Spin The Bottle

Cry to God

Joy P.O.V.

I walked away from everything, and tried to find somewhere where I could just think to myself. I noticed a church center to my right, I'm guessing where people could pray. I opened the door slowly, while looking around and making sure I was the only one there. I wouldn't want to disturb anyone around me. I sat in a chair that was near the huge cross, hung in the front of the room. I looked down for a moment, trying to collect my thoughts, and looked back up, staring at the cross with pain. "Why?" I began, "Why do you hate me so much? My brother's here, dying, and you're up there...just watching him die. How could you do this to me?.......To us? I thought you, out of all people, would be there for us...and help us. But nothing's helping, and its not helping just to yell and plead to you, knowing you're probably not listening anyways. I need to get my feelings out before anyone sees what I feel inside. I wouldn't want anyone to see this side of me....There's at least something good I'm doing here, right? Oh, who am I kidding?" Tears started to roll down my face and my throat was so itchy and dry. It was hard for me to spit my own words out of my mouth, but I somehow managed to do it. "I'm a failure to my brother. I'm a failure to my family.........I'm a failure at everything I do. I'm the one who caused all of this to happen. I made my brother the way he is now...it's all me, and you shouldn't take the blame for something I did. So much is going on, I just...I d-don't know what to do anymore. God, if you're listening...I just wanted to say that I'm sorry for every sin I have committed, and thank you for your time. It was nice while it lasted." I got up with less strength in my knees than before, wiping my tears as I sobbed. I heard sniffling and soft sobbing in the back of the room. It made me jump, but I looked back with curiosity. It was Niall, sitting in the last row, looking at me with tears rolling down his rosey cheeks. I walked up to him with confusion. "How long where you there?" I asked. "The whole time." he managed to let out with a small smile. I immediately hugged him with the tightest grip, not letting go. In fact, I couldn't let go.