Again

FIFTEEN

Again part-15

My lips were on top of his when I heard the door open, my back straightened itself at the sound as jungkook stayed still without a moment.

" Y/n-" lei's voice came through the doorway, as I pulled away shocked.

" Oh, am I interrupting?" he said a little shocked by the sight of me sitting on jungkook's lap, I got off quickly and stood up straight.

" N-no lei, it's nothing, why'd you come back?" I pretended as if everything was fine.

" Angel needed something, so I decided I'd take it for her, anyways, I'm sorry for interrupting, bye guys." he said and closed the door behind him.

I sighed and turned around to see a shocked jungkook sitting on the bed.

" Jungkook I- " my voice was hoarse.

" Why y/n? Is it fun playing with my heart like that?" he asked sounding really hirt, I realized that I'm hurting too many guys like this.

" Jungkook, I'm sorry, I can't hurt lei-" a tear fell down my eyes, making me feel sadder. He didnt wipe them like he used to, he stood up and took a deep breath.

" Y/n, I think I need space, will you be okay here without me?" he asked trying to keep it together, I nodded as he left with a coat.

The tears fell quickly as I laid in bed and cried myself to sleep.

* THE NEXT DAY

I woke up  quicker than usual, the sky was still dark, I opened my phone to see it was 4 am, I felt kinda worried, Jungkook was out for more than 5 hours now so it was messing with my head now.

I decided to put on a coat and start looking for him, with my pyjamas and slippers and a brown coat on, I looked like a hot mess but I couldn't care less.

As I left the room, the chilly air hit my body, the cramps were starting again but I knew I had to look for him. I left the lobby abruptly, making my way to the cars as I got in, I started driving to every park nearby and every garden, but he was nowhere in sight.

I started to speed toward the sea, hoping he didnt do anything bad. After reaching, I got out and without bothering to take my coat, I ran towards the shore, but he was not there. I looked towards my right to see a faint silhouette on the beach chair nearby.

" Jungkook why are you here!" I screamed as I ran towards him angrily. I knew I hurt him but this guy tortured himself too much.

A few bottles of soju were lying beside him, as his head lay on the handrest uncomfortably, his face devoid of any colour.

" Kook you need to wake up! " I said as I held his cold body tightly, this idiot really slept at the beach without bothering about the cold.

" Y/n? Why are you here? " he yawned as he sat up straight.

" So you chose to torture yourself instead of talking to me? " I said, feeling guilty he was like this because of me.

" I- y/n you know- " he sighed as he held his head in frustration.

" Jungkook do you really think that a girl like me deserves your attention? " I asked out loud, I knew I couldn't let this go on for longer.

I shouldn't have been selfish with him, I should've let him go, I shouldn't have given lei false hope either, how much would it have hurt him to see me kiss his best friend? How mich would it have hurt jungkook when I pulled away like that?

Why was I always the one that hurt people like this? Why am I not hurt instead of them? The thoughts brought fresh tears to my eyes as I wiped them angrily.

" It's okay, you can cry if you want to. " jungkook smiled and held me tightly.
As if that sentence set me free, I started to cry out as loud as I could, making all of my tears burst out.

I cried like that for an hour or so before calming down and coming back to my senses. Feeling tired, I looked at him with tear coated eyes.

" So, why can't I love a girl like you y/n? You say its because you hurt me is that it? Let me tell you why it has to be you. Y/n we knew each other since we were in college, I've liked you through all of that, and I love you, even when I tried to go on blind dates and stuff, I wasnt interested, you were the only person I thought about, so yes, it has to be you. " he said, loud and clear.

" Jungkook I don't deserve you. I played with you, I broke up with you saying I fell out of love, I went on dates with lei right after, without even caring about how you felt." I spurted out.

" I went on one with kylie too " he added.

" But what about the one where I danced with random guys? I knew you were watching. Im a bitch to you jungkook, and even though I still- and lei, look how he looked when he walked in on us." I swallowed the part where I wanted tl say I loved him.

" So, I think you did nothing wrong to me, I didnt treasure you enough, and if lei is fine with us being together, if you are not hurting anyone by being with me, then will you be together with me? " he asked and as much as I knew I should let go of him, I didnt want to, it was too much for my heart.

" yes kook." I said.