I.. Is It My Fault?

Chapter 20

...
This has been a while, so I'll post this and the next chapter together.
Well, that's the plan anyway.
Knowing my luck something will fuck up.
...

(Clay's pov)

I woke up, sweating like I usually do. I really need to get these nightmares sorted out.
I spent several minutes in bed before getting up and headed to the bathroom to shower and get ready for the day. After a lengthy shower, I had breakfast downstairs with Olivia and Zander.
They were only about nine years old, I think Olivia was older than Zander, but I wasn't completely sure. I hadn't spent much time with them since I'd been here, but they seemed like good kids. Apparently they had bonded quickly despite having no relation to each other.

They had arrived a few months before me, around the same time as each other. Eva told me that Zander had been abandoned by his parents, while Olivia had been adopted once before, but it didn't work out.
Even with what's happened to them, they don't let it get them down. I kinda envy that..
After eating, I sat on the couch in the living room, drawing. I spent most of the day like that. I heard a car horn about an hour after lunch and a few moments later Simon headed for the front door.
"I'm going!" He called out.
"Where?" Brian asked as he stepped into the hall from the living room.

"Out, don't wait up." Simon answered before leaving the house.
I heard Brian sigh before taking his seat in the chair again.
A few hours later, me and Eli were in Dave's room. I was playing a fighting game with David while Eli was on her phone.
The door bell went off.
"I'll get it." I said as I got up.
"It's probably Rash." Eli told me before I got to the door. "He said he was coming over today."
I nodded and headed down to the front door. I opened it, and she was right. It was Rash.
"Hey Rash." I said with a small smile.
"Hey, Clay.."
He sounded, upset?
"Come in."
He stepped inside and I closed the door.
"We're in Dave's room."

He followed me upstairs and once we were in David's room, Rash fell onto the bed face first. We all watched his unmoving body.
"Um.." David tried.
"What's wrong?" Eli asked.
Rash didn't say anything. He didn't even move. For a few minutes I thought he had fallen asleep, but after a while he turned on his back and sat up to face us. His eyes were bloodshot. Almost like he'd been.. crying?
"Rash?" Eli asked, her voice was laced with worry.
Rash had his head lowered and his hands balled into fists on his lap.
"Rash?.." I asked quietly as I sat on the edge of the bed.
"I.. I need a hug.." He said, raising his head to me.

That took me by surprise. I nodded and he pulled me over to him and sat me on his lap, my back to his chest. He circled his arms around my waist and held me tight.
I felt his chin on my shoulder.
"What happened?" I asked quietly.
I didn't want to pry, but he was actually starting to worry me. I hadn't known him that long, but he was always full of energy. I wasn't used to seeing him like this.
"I.." He took a slow breath, probably to calm himself down. "Yesterday, when I got home.. My parents were fighting. I've seen it happen loads of times in the past. But, Finn has issues with conflict, so I made sure he was ok. He was freaking out, shaking and panicking and the like. This went on for a while before I'd had enough.. "

"I went down and tried to get them to stop. Some things were said. It turns out that my dad was cheating on my mom. He had been for some time. My parents broke up, and mom threw him out the house. But.. He hit her. She ended up in hospital, nothing major. Just a precaution. But I hit my dad. I hit him so hard he was unconscious. Mom asked us to pack his things up and throw them out. He came by the house this morning, and.. It all just kicked off. I.. I think my brother, Casey blames me for it. Can't exactly say I, disagree."

His voice fell silent and his hold on me tightened.
"I'm sorry, Rash." Eli said.
"Yeah, it's tough. You know we're here whenever you need us." David assured him with a small smile.
"Thanks, guys. I just needed to get that off my chest."
I was curious..
"Is your mother ok?"
"Yeah.. Yeah, it wasn't anything serious. The doctor wanted her in overnight in case of a concussion. She's fine. She's just upset about this whole thing."
I rested my hands over his and sank into him. It was the best I could do to offer him some comfort since I wasn't facing him.