𝐽𝐴𝑆𝑃𝐸𝑅 | jasper hale [2]

V. 𝐿𝐼𝑁𝐸𝑆

This whole book is a rollercoaster of fucked up- just letting ya'll know. Also I apologize if I can't update super often..I just started classes again and am a little overwhelmed. I'm trying for every couple days :)
WC: 1,157

       𝑇𝐻𝐸 𝑊𝐸𝐸𝐾𝑆 𝐹𝑂𝐿𝐿𝑂𝑊𝐼𝑁𝐺 my assault were brutal. My bruises had just faded when the SAFE results came back with a match- the man was found on the outskirts of Port Angeles where he was then arrested, due to his many priors, and charged with SA. I had to testify. I had to reel off all of the details I wanted so badly to forget- but I knew it was the right thing. I knew that he was in prison, serving his time. He would never bring harm to another woman.

       I hadn't returned to school yet. The other students were too sympathetic and their pity was overwhelming. One thing I hated more than anything was pity. Aunt Jayne knew this, and treated me as she always had- even though I was now temporarily taking online classes. It was easier that way. People saw me as a victim, I didn't feel like a victim. I felt like a survivor, and I was proud of my progress.

       Bailey had set me us with a counselor who went by the name of Penelope. She was kind and plump, and had an infinitely warm nature. She was almost like Esme in that way, radiating maternal energy. I met with her every other week and she was a large part in my healing process, especially once I was officially diagnosed with post-traumatic stress disorder. It wasn't new- I'd been dealing with it for years, but now I had a support system and could manage it. I could actually begin to heal. Part of me truly felt relieved, like it couldn't possibly get any worse. I knew that was a childish thought, but one could always hope for better.

____

       It was early February, and I had started to spend more time with Bella. It was almost the same. I sipped my tea as she filled me in on all of the somewhat interesting things going on at our school, and how she had begun a new friendship with Jacob Black, a younger boy who lived on the reservation. He was handsome and visibly strong, but also very immature.

"So...you..like..this boy?" Her eyes snapped up to me and I stifled my laughter. "What..that's a reasonable assumption."

"No..I-I don't." I outwardly rolled my eyes at her and played with the bag of herbs.

"..so he likes you?" Her lips pursed into a fine line, annoyance on her features.

"Yeah..it's brutally obvious." I let out small chuckles and slapped her knee.

"Don't lead the boy on, he's basically a kid." She huffed and laid back on my mattress, her hands deep in her hoodie pockets.

"I am not leading him on." She grumbled. "We are just hanging out..as friends." I nodded my head and laid next to her, resting my head on her stomach.

"I hate you."

"You love me." I bursted into a fit of giggles while she shook her head at me.

"You are a-" 

       My stomach twisted and nausea clawed at my throat. I lurched forward, scrambling into my bathroom. My hands grasped the porcelain bowl as my breakfast forced it's way out. Tears pricked my eyes and I continued to gag. I was rarely sick and I had forgotten how miserable and disgusting that act of regurgitation was.

"Rose, are you okay?" I flushed the toilet and leaned against the tub, soaking in the cool surface.

"Y-yeah, I'm alright." It was a fluke. It had to be. I was fine.

____

       I wasn't fine. I wasn't fine at all. Bella left and Aunt Jayne replaced her presence. I hid my sickness from her, already feeling guilty for having put her through so much. I wasn't about to give her something else to worry about.

"You look really good today, Rose." Huh?

"I look like shit, what are you on?" The woman furrowed her brows and let out a hearty laugh making motions to her face.

"Your skin- it's glowing." 

       Oh fuck. My body had betrayed me and suddenly I felt my stomach contract violently. The unfortunately familiar burn came crawling up my throat as I dashed to the sink, emptying my stomachs contents only a second later. Aunt Jayne hurried over to me, wrapping one hand pulling away my curls and the other rubbling my back. My knuckles were white as I gripped the steel, feeling more nauseous than before- even though I hadn't eaten anything.

      Once I was sure I had finished she sat me in a stool. "I-I don't know what's going on.." The woman's eyes narrowed in thought. "Rose, when was the last time you had your..you know?" I furrowed my brows, my face paling with realization.

"I-I haven't..you don't think.." Her lips pressed together in thought and she nodded.

"I do." Fuck.

"What now?" She rested her hands on her hips and gave me a gentle look.

"Well..there are options." Options: I could keep it, I could give it away, or..I could get rid of it. "We should get a test..be sure." I nodded my head in response, my mind racing rapidly. I was praying to whatever cruel God had been watching over me to let this just be a fluke. I couldn't handle this. 

____

"Okay, did you get it?" I slipped my shorts back onto my hips and stared at the plastic object in my hands.

"I think so.." I pushed the door open to reveal a waiting Aunt Jayne. We walked over to the bed and set the test down on a towel. She sat on my windowsill and took a deep breath. Her calmness only adding to my anxiety. I paced the room and ran my fingers through my hair frantically. "How long are we supposed to wait?"

       Her eyes squinted, searching the printed letters on the back of the box. "About five minutes." It already felt like ten. I continued to pace, attempting to distract myself with happy thoughts- but continuously coming up empty.

"It's time." Oh, God.

"You do it." She gave me a pointed look but reached for the test anyways, reading it carefully and double checking the instructions.

"Well...what does it say." The nerves in my stomach continued to rise.

"Um..positive. It says positive. You're pregnant, Rose." Fuck. The nerves rose higher and came up in the form of violent morning sickness. I dashed to the bathroom, a worried Aunt Jayne following in tow. When I had finished, I ran back out to the room, grabbing the test to check myself.

There they were..two small blue lines that would change my life forever, whether I wanted them to or not.