Help! (COMPLETED)

As Far As We'll Go

Paul's Perspective

Two weeks had passed since the night on the beach with John. I don't know about John, but I'll never forget that night. I really loved John, and now I knew he loved me. It made things between us complicated. One of the hardest thoughts to let go of, was the fact that friends shouldn't know how each other's lips taste. I was filled with guilt after kissing John, even though I wanted more. I'd always want more. I wanted to try different things with John; things that were forbidden. Things that were so damn wrong, but at the same time, so right. I was feeling rebellious; the words, "fuck it, just go for it" were pounding inside my head. It was so unlike me to feel this way. It was obvious that the kiss that John and I shared turned John on in a sexual way. As for me, it flipped a switch inside of me that made me want to break the rules. It felt like pure teen spirt. My thoughts kept pulsing around in my mind like a bass drum. I knew that I would have to keep myself together, and hold it in, even though I really wanted to fuck John until he couldn't speak. Even if it was something small, I wanted to do something with John. I wanted to experiment. Moving away from the whole sex and rebelling thing, there was something else on my mind. I was worried for John. He was acting strange, and though I thought I had an idea of what was going on, it still seemed like a new problem was growing. I couldn't figure out exactly what it was.

All of The Beatles and Eppy attended a private and fancy dinner party at the hotel we were currently staying at. The only downside to it, was the fact that we all had to wear tuxedos. Tuxedos look awesome, but wearing them? Not fun at all. Anyways, everything was going fine, until John ate more than all of us combined. All of us kept glancing at John. He had been doing this for a few days now. It started with John snacking, then eventually, he got to the point where he was eating way too much. Somehow, his weight wasn't increasing, in fact, it seemed like his weight was declining a little. It was really concerning to me. See, the thing was that ever since the night at the beach, John and I didn't talk as much I we normally did. In fact, most of the time we would just stare at each other and say a few words. It was awkward, and heart breaking. At that point, I was starting to think that John and I were never going to go back to our normal ways of interacting. We used to lay in the dark in bed at night and talk for hours until we drifted off to sleep. Sometimes, we would go places together and have a blast. We would laugh at the dumbest things, and goof off. I think the best part was that both of us were deeply in love, and every single day, we fell deeper in love. Now that we knew about our love for each other, it would never be the same. I planned to talk to John about it, however, I was still looking for the perfect moment. All of us were having a casual conversation at the dinner table until John kindly requested to go back to the hotel room because he was "tired". Of course, Eppy gave John a hard time about it, but eventually let him go. Ringo looked at me with a concerned look in his eyes. I knew what he was trying to tell me; he wanted me to go back to the hotel room to make sure John was okay. Ever since New Year's, Ringo and I have gone out of our way to make sure John wasn't alone in a room. I waited about five minutes, until I couldn't take it anymore.

"I'm gonna go make sure John is okay, I might not come back down, I'm so sorry," I told Eppy.

I stood up, and Eppy seemed pissed off at the fact everyone was leaving, but this was a huge deal. I needed to make sure John was okay, and after that, talk to him about everything going on between us. I quickly walked out of the dining room, and practically ran up the stairs. Once I finally got up to the fifth floor, I quickly walked through the hallway until I got to our room. It took me more than four minutes to get to the room, meaning that John was alone for almost ten whole minutes! As always, John didn't lock the door, so I had no problem getting inside. I slowly opened the door without making a sound. I heard a small sound come the bathroom. I made my way towards the bathroom door. It was already opened. I stood right outside the door. I found John sitting on the floor in a ball, sobbing.