Secret Love (Boyxboy) (l.s)

Chapter 8

MAY 3, 2014

Another week gone by. Without him. It is so hard for me to imagine a life without him in it. Nearly impossible. I'm unsure of what I'll do when I leave here, how I'll go back to the flat and find his shirt underneath my pillow. I'm unsure of how I'll look at pictures of us knowing that no camera in the world will have the privilege to capture the beauty that was him. I'm not sure what will happen when I wake up in the morning, knowing I no longer have a need to make his favourite cereal. How I'll drive by the stream and think of our first date there, knowing I will never see him roll up his pants to avoid the wet. How I will manage to go shopping and buy meat. How I will be able to function without him. I'm unsure of how I'll even wake up in the morning without the warmth of his body on top of mine. Or how I'll be without the hope that one day we could be together. I am sure of one thing. I was in love with Louis Tomlinson, and I still am.

I'm sat in the office, preparing myself for the torture of relishing in the memories that will never repeat themselves. The excruciating pain of the knowledge that my love is gone.

MAY 27, 2010

I woke to the sun blinding my eyes. I rubbed them and trudged to the kitchen to make coffee. I thought back to the day I discovered they were gone, and became suddenly excited.

I didn't know what to do at first when I found that he was gone. I sat on the porch and cried. It was all I could do. Cry. Feel the warmth of tears stream mercilessly down my face. He was gone. I remember going home and just falling asleep. When I woke, I had a text message from Louis.

To: Harry
I am sorry I've had to leave. I had no choice obviously. I'm coming back the 3rd of Aprilto see you. Mum is going on a business trip with her friends or something.

I remember the flood of relief that coursed through my body. I was going to see him again.

To: Louis
Lou, thank God. You scared the hell out of me. I'll see you soon, I love you so much.

To: Harry
I know, I'm sorry. I love you, too. We'll be alright, Hazz. I've got to go. I love you.

And just like that, I was okay. I was relieved and happy and then I was excited. He was coming to see me. I waited made him some salad and cleaned the place up a bit. I then sat on the couch and waited patiently until a small knock on the door had me leaping to my feet and running to the door.

REALLLY short, but double, maybe triple update so be thankful.