Quarrels & Loves

An Endless Season

Summary: Draco can't sleep; not even when he knows Hermione is safe because she's tucked in his arms and breathing soundly.

It was inevitable for Draco to wake up in the early morning and spend the rest of the night staring up at the ceiling. If he were lucky, he wouldn't wake up until then, but it was often once or twice he'd be forced awake by nightmares before giving up on sleep entirely. Somehow Hermione slept through it, but occasionally she'd be the one to bring him out of them. Draco almost hated those moments more. It was easier to pretend he was fine when Hermione didn't mention them and he didn't wake her with his screams.

It was selfish, really. He hated waking her up from his own nightmares, but he dreaded the times Hermione didn't tell him about hers. Given that her most prominent nightmare stemmed from his childhood home, he felt a little responsible. She never blamed him though. In fact, she almost forced him to hug her tightly for the remainder of the night as if he hadn't been present and done nothing while she'd been tortured. If he fell asleep after, he was often awoken by his own dream about that day.

So yes, it was inevitable for Draco to lie in bed, staring at the ceiling at three thirty-five in the morning. He was rather used to it by now and always took the time to admire Hermione while she slept or run through a current problem at work. Eventually, Hermione would wake up slowly and frown at him as if she knew he'd been awake for hours.

"Go to sleep," she grumbled, startling Draco just enough he jumped. She smiled sleepily and curled closer to him as she looked up at him. "You think too much this early in the morning."

"Ah, but I enjoy it," Draco said, which was only partially a lie. Hermione frowned at him and Draco kissed her forehead. "Go back to sleep."

"Not until you do," Hermione replied, shifting so her chin was resting on his chest and she was staring at him. "If you're planning on staying awake, then I will too."

"Hermione," Draco sighed. He ran a hand through her hair but Hermione didn't move. "I just had a nightmare. I won't be able to sleep again."

Hermione's face fell at his admission and Draco wanted to look away sheepishly, but he didn't.

"Oh, Draco," she said quietly. She shifted again until her arms were wrapped around his shoulders and she was hugging him as best she could in their bed. "You should have woken me up sooner."

"I'm okay," Draco said, though he wasn't going to push her away. He much preferred Hermione hugging him to lying awake alone. "You need to rest or you'll get hurt at work."

Hermione didn't respond. She loved being an auror, but the work was tiring sometimes and if she wasn't constantly on her toes, she was bound to end up in St. Mungo's, something Draco hated more than his own nightmares.

"You need me," Hermione mumbled into his shoulder.

Draco smiled to himself and hugged her tighter. He'd needed Hermione for years before they'd gotten married. Having her so close just seemed to magnify that need ten fold.

"Would you like some tea?" Hermione asked, pulling back to look at him. Draco knew she'd probably lace it with a Dreamless Sleep potion, but he nodded. "What kind?" she asked as she slipped out of bed.

"Mint," he replied. Hermione's nose scrunched up adorably like it always did when he asked for mint tea—which was really the only reason he asked for it—but she nodded.

"I'll be right back," she promised. She pressed a kiss to his lips then hurried out of their bedroom.

Draco sighed, returning to staring up at the ceiling. Hermione wouldn't be back for five minutes he knew, so he silenced the room and rolled onto his stomach. Burying his face into his pillow, he screamed. Without his permission, his eyes watered and he soon found himself sobbing into his pillow.