⸻ THEY SAT ALONE ON A PARK BENCH only a couple of days after [name] had confessed to oikawa about the situation that had prevented her from attending the 'lil tykes' youth volleyball practices.
they were both quiet, unable to begin a conversation since, once again, it was only them two together.
oikawa wanted to ask her so many questions. how was she feeling? was she getting better? would she ever visit them again? why couldn't they talk to each other even now? august was less than a week away, which meant she was one step closer to leaving and they would probably never see each other again.
"oh!" the heartbroken girl spoke up, oikawa's eyes widening at the sudden sound of her soft voice and the shuffling of her hands digging in the bag that sat on the floor against her legs. she was humming as she rummaged through, pulling out a sealed envelope with a smile.
she held it out towards him, let out a breath as the confused coach lifted a brow and took it from her hands.
"what's this?" he examined the white envelope, looking at the labels and returning address. his eyes were growing in shock, looking up at the seemingly nervous girl with held her hand on her chest.
"i haven't opened it yet," she began, staring into oikawa's brown eyes that was rumored to make any girl melt. she pushed her lips into a smile, "i was going to open with semi whenever i got it, but yeah."
he looked back down at the envelope, handing it back to her and followed her palms that carefully peeled the envelope open. it was slow, as if she was trying to keep her movements as delayed as possible so that the potential bad news wouldn't be revealed.
the soft sounds of paper ripping had finally halted, [name] reaching her painted fingernails inside and pulling out a folded piece of paper with heavy breathes.
the paper was unfolded in her hands, quickly skimming through until the young woman had cupped her mouth with a gasp that was hard for oikawa to read. she wasn't smiling nor was she frowning, she only passed it off to him from the side with her mouth covered and a tear falling down her face.
the ex-captain was even more nervous. he then skimmed through the letter as well until his eyes landed on the one word that would determine everything.
"'we are delighted to inform you that-'"
his words were cut off by a pair of arms being thrown around him, the watermelon loving girl hugging him tightly. she was filled with nothing more than pure glee and happiness as tears of joy fell down her cheeks as his arms wrapped around her waist.
"y-you got in," oikawa stammered. was it selfish that he was disappointed? was it selfish that he wanted her to be rejected just so that she had a reason to stay a little longer? he gulped, "i'm so happy for you."
they stood in that position for quite some time. arms wrapped around each other like they were the only company the other person had, and that was okay.
when they did separate from their hug, it was slow. they both held a guilt, a voice in the back of their head telling them that it was wrong for them to confide in one another for some reason. maybe it was because [name] had just gotten out of a relationship.
but, oikawa couldn't help himself from placing his hand on her cheek. his thumb caressed her soft skin, hues staring into one another.
his gaze then traced her lips, the way they parted softly to let out a shaky breath almost made him crash into her right then and there. her shoulders had tensed whenever his thumb brushed against her, her chest heaved whenever he inched closer and closer towards her and neither of them had the willpower to pull themselves back.
"oikawa, w-what're you doing?" her voice was a low whisper. it was innocent and smooth, the words that had left her. her eyelashes were fluttering, too anxious as to what would happen next. she knew if she pulled away, it would hurt him- but she knew that if she allowed their lips to connect, it would only make things more complicated.
he didn't remove his hand, he didn't back away, but he didn't move closer. he didn't know what to do, his heart was telling him to close the gap between them. it was telling her to treat her better than she was before. his brain, on the other hand, scolded him- telling him that it would only ruin the friendship they built up.
"oikaw-"
"i like you."
[name] felt her chest fall, a pit form into her stomach as the black goo of guilt covered her entire body and sank her deeper and deeper inside. she knew and she would be lying if she told him she didn't. even all the times she denied it to her boyfriend or herself, deep down, the soon-to-be college student knew.
"i know," she had confessed, her [eye color] eyes moving to look at the floor in shame.
the graduate stared. his chocolate brown eyes couldn't leave her as he lifted her chin up delicately to look back at him. of all the things he wanted to say, he couldn't allow himself to. she had known, she was aware of how he felt now. he had finally told her without constantly having to be trapped in bars of fear.
oikawa tooru was no longer drowning.
he pressed against her, both of his hands moving to her cheeks to deepen their kiss and as their lips connected, all he could think in that very moment was how amazing she was. how blessed he was to have his lips pressed against the girl that he believed he had waited an eternity for.
then, his beliefs were ripped away.
she removed her lips from his, eyes wide and chest heaving heavily as she instinctively stood up from the park bench and stared down at him. she could see the regret that instantly clouded his eyes once she pulled away with watering eyes.
"i-i can't do this."
YOU ARE READING
watermelon sugar.
FanficWATERMLON SUGAR [ t. oikawa , fem!reader , completed ] i'm selfish for wanting you the way that i do.