Home (JG)

11

Ryan
when i woke up Jack wasn't at my house. skate and derek were. they came to check up on me.
"jill knows by the way." skate says. i nod.
"Jack said you had a bad night." derek trails. i nod again.
"just couldn't sleep." i say. he nods.
"what's wrong?" skate asks.
"i don't know what to do." i say.
"as in?"
"Jack." i say.
"ryan.."
"it's just confusing. i wanna be with him but, i....I just can't bring myself to actually tell him any of that."
"its not good for you to get back with him-"
"he was the only thing keeping me happy skate." I glance up at him and he sighs and looks at Derek
"shorty, he didn't make you happy. he made you numb to what you felt." derek says. I roll my eyes
"he didn't make me nu-"
"yes he did, ry." skate says. I roll my eyes.
"im not gonna have this conversation with you." I say.
"then who are you gonna have it with?" he asks
"you're not helping me."
"no, Ryan. I'm telling you what you need to hear not what you want to." he says. i shake my head.
"jills on her way home. you guys can go." i say. skate grabs his keys and tosses them to derek who walks out. skate grabs me and pull me to him, hugging me. i hug him back.
"live life, ry. don't focus on the past or what could be. please. i've seen too many people get fucked up from that." he says. i nod.
"i love you dude. and i just wanna see you happy." i nod again. he gives me one last squeeze and then kisses my forehead and walks out. i hear the front door open and close. i let out a big sigh and then grab a water and head upstairs.

-a few hours later-
jill and i went to skate a little bit ago, and both ended up drinking. skate didn't want us to but ultimately let us.
"no more." skate says after pouring us two shots each. he then puts the bottle up and i groan. jill and i take the two shots. skate she's his head and leans against the counter. the rest of the boys walk in. derek come behind me and wraps his arm around my shoulder.
"what are drinking?" i ask. everyone else is in conversation.
"lemonade." he says, taking another drink.
"like, spiked orrr?" i question.
"taste it." he puts his hand under my chin and leans my head back. he then pours a little in my mouth. i swallow it and make a face.
"that's disgusting." i say. he laughs.
"you don't like dark liquor." he says. i shake my head.
"yea cuz it's fucking gross." i say. he rolls his eyes.
"shut up, ry." he says. i smile. dereks cute i'll admit, but he's just...he doesn't seem like the relationship type.
"y'all wanna swim?" jill asks me and derek. i shake my head
"i'll get sick cuz of the sun." i say. she nods and then looks at derek
"i'll monitor her." he says. jill laughs and nods and then the rest of them walk out back.
"i'm not a baby." i say.
"no. you'll drink all the alcohol." he says. i laugh.
"i just want a little more. i've had 3 shots." i say. he rolls his eyes
"no. cuz then skate will yell at me." he says.
"take the bottle and hide it somewhere." i say.
"where ryan?" he questions. i shrug.
"your room." i say. he studies me for a minute and then reaches into the cabinet and grabs the bottle. he grabs two shots glasses and motions for me to follow him.