Verge of Insanity

Chapter Forty

Mara Leigh

The party was just what I feared. The whole pack in the expansive yard behind the pack house, eating, drinking, and having a ball. Blythe had run streamers and balloons all around the deck and surrounding trees, most likely with Beau or Ella's help. It was a spectacle.

I was also a spectacle. Blythe had insisted Ella help me with my makeup and hair while she finished prepping for the party. Xander had insisted on buying me more clothes a few weeks back, and Ella had searched through my closet to see what new clothes I had to work with. She settled on a leather skirt that I honestly couldn't remember buying and wasn't thrilled with the short length or the slit showing more of my leg. I had a black tank top and black lace overlay tucked into the skirt that I couldn't quit tugging at, worried that it hugged my fat too much and showed too much of my chest through the lace. I was in a pair of cheetah print heels, and dangle earrings to match.

I knew I looked good. I had looked at myself in the mirror when Ella was finished with me. I looked like a boss, like a Luna who knew what she was doing. I hadn't tugged at my outfit until the Rogers sisters had swarmed on us. As soon as Xander had finished announcing me when we arrived, they were all around him, almost pushing me out of the little circle they'd formed. Seeing them and their stick thin selves oozing confidence seemed to make me question myself. I think that is what pissed me off the most. More than them hanging all over Xander's every breath, I was pissed off that looking at them made me look at myself differently.

My anger grew more fierce throughout the party, fueled by not only the sisters, but the minds of the pack members around me. Most of them were also watching the show between us and the sisters, and wondering why I hadn't done anything, and then some were lost in their own affairs. No matter what their thoughts were, it was taking all the 'joy' out of the party to try to keep my wall up to block their minds separate from mine.

I heard Blythe call me mentally. I glanced over at where she stood over by the cake and drink tables. Once she saw me glance her way, she continued.

I have some candles for you to blow out after we sing to you. Would you like to go ahead and do that?

I know I made a face. Pleeease don't make me get sung to or blow out candles, Blythe. I'm doing all I can here to get out of minds and not lose my temper.

I understand, honey. You do what you need to do.

We walked over to one of the tall skinny tables Blythe had set up for us to stand around. Delilah, Maeve, and Callie squeezed themselves around the table we were walking to, just as Ella and Beau were about to take the places they rushed to. I caught a not so nice thought from Ella, who had stronger words to describe them than what I let myself use.

My face was definitely showing how flustered I was becoming, because Xander reached over and squeezed my hand.

"You'll get better at blocking them," he murmured, leaning down to kiss the top of my head.

Xander's words to me cut off whatever trash Delilah had been saying prior to his attention focusing on me, and I could see her reaction out of the corner of my eye.

Hateful thoughts entered my mind all at once, and I couldn't stop them.

Always focusing on that weak little slut.... Came Deliliah's thoughts.

Like a waterfall the rest of their thoughts came in like a blur, interrupting each other, not giving me any time to think.

I've made myself available to him for years and yet he snubs me—snubs all of us.... Maeve's mind roared.