The Thought Of Her

:17:

His POV

Her gentle hazel brown eyes took over my thoughts .

Before I left I laid her down on her bed and picked up her room a bit . I quietly left . She didn't need me . She just needed closure . I have to let her move on . I love her to the point where I'm able to lose her cause i can't be selfish with her . Being selfish with her means I make her suffer . I don't want to make her suffer ....

It takes a man his whole heart to  let the love of his life go for the better . Especially when you know that you are causing the pain . It's harder to step back from them , but you have too it's necessary.

Just to see her cheesy grin on her face one more time would make my soul a feel a little more alive .

Her soft gentle lips brushing against mine as she prepares herself to give me a kiss . A kiss ...
A kiss from her would cure even the littlest wounds in a mans soul .

Her golden eyes shining as the sunlight hits them making them glisten like golden glitter .

Every so often she'll move making her eyes twinkle . I swear just looking at them felt as if I was a main character in a movie .

"I love you ." I hear her whisper in my ear even when she's not there . It's like her voice is forever engraved into my mind . As if the ghost of her is here with me . Just those three words can change a mans life .

Her hand caressing my face as she stares into my eyes . It gave me a feeling of euphoria. A feeling of peace .

But now it's all gone .

It's all gone to keep her happy and have her flourish into the beautiful woman she was and is .

They say a man should never cry and I think that's  bullshit . How could you not cry after seeing the most beautiful and important person in your life go .

You can't cry out to them when you need . You can't enjoy their company. You can't have them anymore. That will tear anybody up . Leave you forever in agony in some cases . But I know she wouldn't want me suffering over her . She would call it foolish and tell me to never cry or feel any type of pain over her .  She doesn't want me too weep .

But I can't resist it . Warm tears are falling down my face .

The picture of her walking down the isle in a white gown makes me tear up like no other .

She looked so gorgeous that day . She was smiling brighter than I have ever seen .

Her soft gentle eyes staring into mine as she stood before me saying "I do"  just reappears into my mind on a loop .

The tears streaming down her face cause she knew she was all mine . She thought of me as the most incredible man in her life at the time .   Marcey just took the spotlight.  She was the real queen being celebrated that day .

She is part of my heart and soul . The part that has always held me together wether I noticed or not. That woman holds a special place in my whole entire existence.

Flash back

"Hey sweetheart." She said as she caressed my face .

I laid next to her holding her in my arms . 

"Hey ." I gave  her a gentle smile .

"Do you know that you have given me the most amazing moments of my life." She said then kissed my cheek.

"I wouldn't trade anything in the world not even our little arguments .  That makes us human ." She said .

——————

What can you do when the love of your life leaves . Go insane ? Well that is just not the case unless that was your whole life .

What is a mad man supposed to do . You can't control the rage . You can't control yourself. Glass shattered.... your belongings thrown across the room . The after math .....

That is just the rage that was released from your soul that was hurting .

But anyway .......

Losing your other half hurts . It hurts more than anything . You go from having a best friend to having nothing. That's life sometimes. You have to let them be them if you want to see them in bliss .

What can I say  , Marcey Channing  was that bliss in my life .  Now I just have to find  new happiness.

*knock*

*knock *

I got up confused wondering who it could be . It's 4in the morning .

I opened the door .

My heart immediately sank to my stomach .

"You didn't have to leave ." Marcey stood at my door step with tears in her eyes and a red flushed face .