Secrets & Lies

26| Pleasurable Delirium

Logan glanced at the condom in his hand then back to me. "What?" 

"You heard me." 

"You want me to fuck you?" His eyes narrowed. "You're fucking with me, aren't you?"

I rolled my eyes and chuckled. Of course he would think I was messing with him. I always told him I would never be a bottom—and I meant it. At the time, I meant it. The idea of being a bottom...The way my mind worked after everything with my parents...It scared the hell out of me. When I was a top, I was the one doing the fucking. I was in control. This—this was different. 

"No, I'm not fucking with you." I leaned into Logan's body, putting my mouth to his ear and tracing the shell with my tongue. "I want you to fuck me, Logan. I want to feel you inside me."

Logan groaned and his fingers dug into my the skin at my hip. I pulled back a little and saw the heated look in his eyes. His gaze ran over my body and he wet his lips. Oh yeah. He wanted this. So did I.

Logan always tended to be the vulnerable one in our relationship—WHOA. Relationship. Fuck that sounded good. As I looked at him now, I knew I never wanted anything more than to lose my 'virginity' to Logan Thorne. 

I leaned back and met his gaze again. I took the condom from him and tore it open. My eyes never left his as I threw the wrapper to the side and rolled the condom onto his hard length. Logan bit down on his bottom lip, eyes sliding shut.  His sex was thick and straining. Throbbing in my hand. I don't think I've ever see him so hungry. For me.

I grabbed him by the chin and gave him a sound kiss. "Do it, Logan."

All the hesitation and confusion seemed to melt away from him. Something changed in his demeanor. He was more possessive. Dominant. He had never done the fucking. Not with me, at least. This was a first for both of us.

I leaned against him again—burying my hand in his hair and kissed his jawline. His lips. His neck. "Come on, Logan. I know you've thought about it. About how it would feel to be inside me." A long, low groan from Logan vibrated against my mouth. "I want you, Logan. Right-fucking-now."

"Turn around," he growled.

I did as I was told and Logan pushed me not-so-gently onto the bed. I braced myself; holding up my body with my outstretched arms.

Even though I begged for this, I couldn't help but feel a little nervous. My body tensed as I waited for the invasive pressure. But it didn't come. Not at first. Instead, I felt Logan's lips trailing down my spine. Fuck. 

As if he read my mind, Logan reached around and stroked me. My back arched and my hips pushed forward, trying to get him to take more of me in his hand. I could feel his erection pressing into me; but I didn't feel nervous anymore. How could I when I was lost to the effects of his touch?

"Breathe," Logan whispered in my ear.

I felt him grip my shoulder. When I felt him start to push inside me, I took a few additional deep breaths. If someone had told me this is what I would be doing a year ago, I would have laughed in their face. Or punched them. Maybe both. 

When Logan was all the way in, he dropped his head to my shoulder. "Fuck." 

I gritted my teeth, trying to get used to the new sensations he was delivering. Having him inside me was...indescribable. It felt foreign. Full. But I would be lying if I said I didn't fucking love it. He pulled out slowly, then thrust back in. Again. In. Out. Faster each time he did it.

"So fucking good," he moaned. Logan gripped my waist and his fingernails dug into my skin. After a few seconds, he slowed. "Do you want me to stop?"