Lost Without You

~11~

Don't say anything! My subconscious whisper-shouted while I was thinking where to start with my confession. You'll only lose your friend!

Whether my subconscious agreed with me or not, I had to tell Lia. She was my best friend. And if someone was going to at least try to believe me, it was her.

"His father. Wow," Lia said, pouring some water for both of us. "Since when do you like older, married, or divorced men with adult children? The blonde guy I saw with you must be our age... so his father would be what, some forty-five years old?" she asked, laughing.

"Lia, please, stop it. This is not funny," I begged. "Just think that if you are right and I'm really pregnant, I'll have to move out, and that will be the smallest of my problems."

"That's not a problem at all. You'll finally move out, that's it. Tell me about the rest," she insisted. "Who is the mysterious 'father'? Do I know him?"

"You don't. But you have seen him. Remember the guide in Bran...?"

"But... You've only just met him, it wouldn't sum up... you are at least two months pregnant, possibly more... And he definitely didn't look old enough to be the other man's father. They could be brothers," she said thoughtfully, her fork pausing halfway to her mouth, eyebrows knitting in confusion.

You have to continue. If you don't tell her now, when she brought it up herself, you'll never gather enough courage to talk to her about it again... I mused, picking up a slice of pizza with my fingers and bringing it to my lips.

"Lia, I know how this sounds. But that guide, Vlad, is the blonde guy's father. He is not forty-five, but thirty-two. Forever."

"Wait. What sort of name is that? Vlad, like Dracula? The Impaler, I mean. And even if... How can he be thirty-two, and 'forever', if his son is as old as us?" she asked around a mouthful of pizza. "Samara, you know, you are not making any sense. It's not the first time, to be honest, but this time you are exaggerating, don't you think? This... Vlad of yours starts to sound like one of the many imaginary friends you had when we went to nursery school."

"Lia, it's true," I said, looking at her pleadingly.

"Ok. I... trust you? You are my best friend. I promise I won't laugh or criticize, but I want to know everything so I can think it through. And you must eat, it's important in your condition. That, and the peace of mind. You mustn't worry. I'm here for you," she said, bringing new tears in my eyes with her declaration.

I blinked them away rapidly before she would notice, while Lia finished another slice of her pizza.

"I know that something strange has happened to you," she said, pushing her plate to the side and replacing it with her notebook. "You're pregnant, but I only saw you nauseous a couple of times. You keep ignoring forks," she added as I picked at my food with my fingers again. "From one day to another, you stopped using make-up and changed your style completely. And you look so much... not older, but... more experienced and sadder... And... " She trailed off momentarily, taking a deep breath, her pupils going wide with curiosity as she stared at me. "I remember well the guide in the castle, Vlad, as you call him, and his 'son'... " She shuddered. "There was something strange about them. They were... something else. The way you looked around that black-haired man, it wasn't you... Tell me everything so I can try to understand you, Samara. Please."

I wiped my fingers thoroughly with a white linen napkin and took a sip of water, playing for time.

"Samara. Come on. I said I believed you. I just want to catch on."

Fine, I thought, taking a deep breath. "Vlad is my husband," I said, letting my eyes drop to my hands. I turned my ring around, making the diamond lustre and shine in the bright lights of the restaurant. "This is not an engagement, but a medieval wedding ring."