𝗛𝗘𝗔𝗧𝗛𝗘𝗥 ━━ 𝖻𝗋𝗒𝖼𝖾 𝗁𝖺𝗅𝗅

𝘅𝗶𝗶𝗶. 𝗺𝗲𝘀𝗺𝗲𝗿𝗶𝘇𝗲𝗱

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december 3, 2019
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THE LAST FEW DAYS have been a blur. ever since you said i love you under the impression that i was sleeping, all my thoughts went away. for once, i was happy. we spent every single day together, making use of the benefits that came with out friendship. when we came back to la, i was constantly at sway. not just because i just couldn't—i really couldn't see my dad knowing what he's done—see my dad, it was also because i felt like i was finally someone's first choice.

like i was finally good enough. i longed for that. i hadn't felt this way in a while. today we had a few people over. addison, nailea, charli, dixie...everyone in between. i was tanning, for a photoshoot next week. i hated fake tan, and for once the sun was out. but what do i expect? it's winter.

"what's up everybody, welcome back to the fucking vlog! i honestly have no clue what the fuck im doing today but, ya'll already saw the title! i'm throwing my girl in the pool today. i don't know why, i just feel like it. so, cut to the clip." you mumbled quietly behind a tree so i couldn't hear.

"hi, ellie!" i looked over at you, smiling from the yard chair. you smiled back. i wasn't ever a fan of your pranks, but i never really learned how to stay on guard. i open my arms so you could hug me, but to my surprise you pick me up, carrying me toward the pool.

"bryce micheal hall i swear to god if you throw me in that cold ass motherfucking pool i will bite your dick off." i whine, before you let go. the water filled my ears before i swam to the surface. "bryce." i say, catching my breath. i jump out of the freezing water, shaking. he chuckled, taking off his sweater. the sun was setting, making his cheekbones look even more defined. your eyes were brown as ever. you smiled, making it look like you were about to kiss me. you cut me off by handing me the polyester sweater in your hand to me. i put it on quickly.

"it looks better on you then it does on me. keep it." he tucks a piece of hair behind my ear. i lean in to give him a kiss on the cheek but he turns, looking at something behind me. "bryce?" i put my hand on his before he yanked it away making me flinch.

"cut it out aurelia, we're not alone." he says, harshly. i frown at the boy before turning around to see what he was looking at. he was always okay with showing me off to his friends, or other random bitches. it confused me om why all of a sudden he was ashamed. but then i saw her. addison. of course. im stupid for ever thinking that he wanted me. why would i think he would even want to kiss me? im not even half as pretty as her. i never was. she's got him mesmerized. fucking mesmerized. while i sit here looking like a yard gnome. a fucking yard gnome. i was the only thing standing in the way of their epic romance. and to think i was supposed to tell you how i felt about you that day. that i was catching feelings.

"how are you gonna tell me you love me, and then act like im just some bitch that you're fucking? you confuse me. you really have a gift bryce hall." i say, as i take off the sweater, throwing it onto his lap. he looked at me confused before realizing that i had heard him that night. i roll my eyes. i needed to get away.