moving to gotham (Discontinued)

settling in

When I woke up I looked at where I was for the first time. Her temporary home consisted of 4. She was currently in her bedroom. It had a queen sized bad and a tv across from it. Squashed next to the bed near the wall was a little table. On the left side of the room there was a cute little white desk. She made a mental note to paint it later as now she was in no mood to do it. On the other side of the room there are 2 bookshelf's in a triangular shape with a beanbag in the middle. It made a rather cute reading nook although it would be better with some fairy lights. She would do a lot of renovation.(sorry if I suck at making descriptions I'm doing my best).
That day I did nothing. Not even get out of bed I just sulked. Thought about the time before lila when I was happy and when I thought they were my friend. Before I became guardian. Things were so easy then and I took that for granted. I looked at old photos. Every single emotion that had bottled up spilled out. There was sadness, anger, disgust, fear, hatred, and love. The lingering love that I had for all the people who betrayed me. The platonic love for my old friends, the romantic love for adrian and cat noir,(in this fanfic she had, had a little bit of a crush on cat noir but she focused on saving the world),and her love for her parents. She missed them so much the old them. The caring, strong, trusting version of them. She stayed in her bed for a few days. She hadn't realized how much she had bottled up. It felt weird to feel emotions unnatural. This was is why she enjoyed patrol. Because she didn't want to worry her friends she bottled up her emotions. It felt good to not feel. She wanted to stay like that forever but alas she knew that was unhealthy. Plus she couldn't have another explosion like that day at the hospital. It caused her to make some dumb decisions like moving gotham without a parent or any proper planning at all.
She started to get better slowly but surely. She started off by eating. Not a lot but it was something. Then she began doing some more commissions and creating clothes for her friends as a sorry for leaving. She became more engaged during patrols. This helped make her friends feel better. They had noticed the change and it was nice seeing her old self back. Not her lila is bullying me self but her old old self. The one that had been long forgotten. Even if she was still pretty much the same baby steps. Plus what did you expect all her trauma to disappear in a day.