A Marriage of Convenience

Chapter 19

When you walk away

I count the steps that you take

-Avril Lavigne (When you're gone)
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Hinata didn't know what she had done wrong now.

But it hurt. Knowing everything was going back to the way it had been in the beginning. When Sasuke treated her with nothing but cold indifference.

It really, really hurt when he'd started to pull away and she could do nothing about it.

Nothing except watch the rift grow larger and larger.

He was never home again. Never spent time with her and the tentative feelings....the warmth that being with him provided her, started to fade away soon.

The budding dreams, which had started to raise themselves again...it was like they'd started to die again. But her real question was why?

Why was he doing this?

She'd truly thought they were getting somewhere. Why was he doing this again? Didn't he feel...any compassion towards her?

Had it all been in her stupid mind? These questions haunted her again and again and again. And yet...he never came home

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"Sasuke!"

Hinata's palm remained hovering in mid air as she paused. He'd snuck up on her from behind and she'd almost attacked him with her gentle fist before she'd realized who it was.

And though it seemed quite obvious...she couldn't help but add.

"You're back."

He was. And he looked absolutely exhausted. His face had the obvious signs of exhaustion. His eyes had bags underneath them and he was standing in a drooped posture.

"Are you-" she started to ask before she shook her head and activated her Byakugan to ascertain for herself if he had any injuries.

He seemed fine. Just tired. And low on Chakra.

"Hinata..." he breathed out. She snapped her eyes to his. He seemed to be in a dream like state. 

"Sasuke...what's wrong?" she asked him but he shook his head and grabbed her hand. What the-? Was he drunk?

"You need to rest." she told him as she started pulling him to his room. He didn't resist as he followed the gentle tug of her small hand.

She took him to his bed and made him sit. "Oh Sasuke..." she said when she realized it was the first time he'd been home in two months. He'd taken a long term mission to the land of Hot springs.

"Lay down...please." she asked him. He nodded and did as she asked. She took off his sandals and his weapons pouch. Draping his blanket over him, she stroked his hair back from his forehead on a sudden whim.

"Rest." She told him as she made to leave. He closed his eyes, obliging her like a child but he still muttered.

"Thank you."
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She was sitting on her bed, knees drawn to her chest, still contemplating what the hell was going on, hours later. She couldn't sleep. The dark sky outside was lit up by dim stars.

She sighed again. Before a yell scared her beyond her wits.

Someone was screaming. Sasuke! she thought as her eyes widened.

She jumped off her bed, almost tripping over heself in hurry to get to him. She ran to his room to see him thrashing on his bed.

"Sasuke..." she whispered as she ran to his bedside and on his bed. He was thrashing wildly. He was having a nightmare.

"Sasuke!" she said, grabbing his arms. "Sasuke! It's a nightmare." she touched his face. He almost pushed her off the bed.

Her concern grew when he wouldn't be pacified. "Sasuke!" she tried to wake him up. "Wake up, it's a nightmare." she grabbed his arms again.

But he couldn't hear her. So she did the only thing she could think of. 

She slapped him. As hard as she could. His face turned the other way from the force of her slap.

He stopped thrashing as his eyes snapped open, blood red with the Mangakeyo. He grabbed her forearms and straddled her in an instant, grabbing her neck roughly.

Then he paused...as if he started seeing clearly.

"It's me Sasuke...it was a nightmare." she whispered, because damn his grip on her neck was like iron and she couldn't breathe properly-

He immediately let go of her and got off her, seemingly embarrassed. "God damn it." He whispered as he closed his eyes and ran a hand through his hair.

Hinata sat up and looked at him tentatively.

"I've never heard you having a nightmare before." she remarked.

Sasuke sighed again before looking at her tiredly. As if he was tired of being who he was. Like it was taking a heavy toll on him.

"You're usually asleep...and they're usually not this bad."

"Sasuke...you should have told me." she said, horrified. Sasuke shook his head.

"It's not your burden to carry, Hinata." he admitted. "They're always going to be haunting me." 

"I can try to help." she said, touching his arm lightly. He sighed again.

"Is this why you've not been coming home now? The nightmares?" she asked, hurt evident in her eyes. Sasuke didn't have it in him to meet her eyes.

"No. The nightmare-I haven't slept properly in months and i couldn't break myself out of this one even if i tried." he told her, attentive of the hand on his arm. 

"Then what is it?" she asked.

Sasuke had an impulse to just clear everything up with her, right there and then. But then, he realized why he'd started doing this in the first place.

"Please...just don't push me away. Give me a chance...to be there for you. To try and help. To ease your nightmares. To care for you." she said, tears unexpectedly filling her eyes. 

"Hinata, trust me, whatever I'm doing is better for you...and for me."

"It's my decision whether i want to care for you or not. Not yours. I want to be there for you. Because...you're all I have left."

Her statement caught him off-guard. She didn't want to lose him. Him. 

Her words seemed to break something inside him as he looked at her face frantically, as if searching for something. He knew he should keep his distance but even if he couldn't tell her everything, she deserved to know-

His fingers weaved through her silky hair as he guided her with a gentle tug on the back of her head. And then he smashed his lips against hers.

This she thought this was-everything.

It felt so natural-so right to do this with him. He seemed to be pouring all his emotions and reservations and thoughts to her. Showing her how he wasn't good with words but how desperate he was to show her. To let her know. The one person he cared about now.

It was rough, passionate and perfect. And when they broke away, breath coming in desperate puffs, he closed his eyes and rested his forehead against hers. Their breaths intermingling, she realized, he'd never been so bare...so vulnerable in front of anyone else.

She could've been imagining it, but his voice broke a little as he told her the single truth of the night.

"You're all I have too." 

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AUTHOR NOTES: Well folks, here we are...getting somewhere. Let me know if u freaked out reading this because I definitely did while writing this. Comment what u thought about the chapter ❤️