Choose Me (zuko x aang)

All Hail Fire Lord Zuko

Zuko

All hail Fire Lord Zuko"

I held my breath as I was officially announced as the new Fire Lord of the nation. Looking out at all my people in the crowd of the four elements, I couldn't see anyone. Everything was blurry and my heart kept beating erratically in my ears. Holy shit I felt like I was gonna puke. I needed get a hold of reality quickly.

Suddenly, I felt a warm gentle hand at the back of my neck and the commotion in my head came to a halt. I turned my head to the right and my eyes fell on the young monk standing only inches away from me. He was watching the crowd with the most heart stopping grin on his face. He was lit up like the sun and his warmth calmed me. I followed his eyes to where my family stood, cheering me on. Katara, Sokka, Suki, Toph, Uncle,..Katara. I hid the quick grimace that washed over my face before my nation could see it, and then I looked back at him, Aang. He turned his head and met my eyes. He held me completely captive in that moment. I held my breath, again, when a small kind smile reached his lips.

Shit. Fuck. Shit

It was like every cell in my body was lit on fire from the inside when I felt his thumb graze the nape of my neck. I wanted to lean my head back into his hand and feel his fingers in my hair. How pathetic. I shouldn't even entertain the idea, knowing that the avatar already had the one thing he'd ever wanted, Katara. I felt my face scrunch up again when I thought  of her name. But how could I blame her. He was brilliant and extraordinary. And he was already hers.

The ceremony continued for a short time before the celebrations came to an end. My family was throwing me a party later in the palace in honor of the end of the war and the beginning of my reign as Fire Lord. I needed some time to be alone. To be out of my head and rest up for later. And tonight was the right time. I had to say something to Aang. I had to build up the courage to speak my mind. And I had to let him go if he decided as much.

Fuck this.

                                               ~

I allowed the servants to enter my room to help me out of my robes and run a bath. It felt weird to let anyone to take care of me. I was long used to taking care of myself. I pretended that the young women's eyes didn't linger on my body as I stripped down to nothing. I didn't care what they saw, or what they would make of what they saw. I probably wouldn't remember what they looked like the minute they left.

I sank slowly down into the water and felt my tense muscles loosen immediately. The heat felt good on my skin and my mind began to wander back to the moment I shared with Aang earlier that day. My face got hot and I plunged my head under the water the second I could feel his hands again. Stay under. Please.

But I couldn't do it. I couldn't run away from my future, and I couldn't escape the feeling gnawing at my mind every time he reappeared in my thoughts. I had to be strong for my nation and for the sake of the world. But how could I be strong when Aang was both my strength and my weakness. I was lost.

I never imagined how my life would change when I chose to find my honor with the avatar and his friends. I remembered the moment he allowed me to stay, as if it was yesterday. But I didn't know then how my heart would soon change in more ways than one.

I came back up for air and I pushed him as far into the back of head as I could allow. Stepping out of the warm water in the the cool air of my room cleared my thoughts and I slowly rolled into bed and pulled up my dark red comforter. The whole room was a dark ruby and black and my eyes closed to block out the rest of the world around me. I drifted away slowly and the last thing I saw were eyes the color of charcoal and a small smile.