Serene Affairs

0 | prologue

Trust me on this it is no fun in being a rich princess with loads of servants on your call and piss. It sucks. In the name of  izzat and  shaan father is chaining my happiness! I wish there was a prince somewhere who could come and save me from this binding castle and in return I could simply give endless love!

-KN

I saved my finger from being scrapped against the sharp edge of my table because, very interestingly I could relate very much to the girl in this diary, as if she were speaking my heart out in the paper but grudgingly it was her story. If someday I ever bump into her I will give her a warm hug and even tell her that only having a prince in our dissembling life is not the solution for the problems. I wish I could meet her someday.

Shutting off the lamp light I tried sleeping without thinking about the girl of this old rusted diary.

~

Args!   I couldn't control my anger . . why does Papa think only his surname is my life. How can he lecture on being a good wife even before I am married? He has no right to shout on me and make me feel like I don't deserve this damn life! Only because his other daughter agreed to take the linen trail she becomes the main character and I , the villain? This palace is bloody haunted! I want to die. This life is a curse.

-KN

I was getting quite disappointed with the girl in this diary, she shouldn't have thought about the wrong approach of death. Dying should never be an option at any circumstances and what is with the linen trials and palace, is she really a princess or something? 

The first question should probably be - from which era did this diary and she belong to?

~

I refused to study business. I cried for two hours and then all the  pain evaporated after the long bath in the swimming pool. The water was really warm. How nice it would have been to live forever in the water :)

Papa bought a wedding planner to change the exteriors of this so called home, how stupid. I wish he dies quickly so that I can live my life. I hate him, so ,so, much. I am going to find me a tutor to learn German.

-KN

The more this girl in the diary wrote the more confusing things are getting for me. I placed her in the business category where her family has a fortune enough to feed the next seven generations - like the ones where bathing in a pool of money cleanises their body - types of rich. 

That was easier for me because I fall in the same category. My grandfather is very similar to the father of this girl in the diary, always wanting me to be a prim and proper heiress. I wish I could slander his orders with my confidence to do what I want to like the girl of this diary. I should better name her something.

Whatever the situation can be, how much ever ugly grandfather turns out to be, I can never wish to kill him or let him die, he was still family. This girl seemed to be very immature and heartless wishing her father to be dead.

~

Life is going berserk. I can't marry that bastard!  What is Papa really thinking about asking  me to just give away my prestige for saving a goddamn business? I really can't understand why is it happening with me and why  . . . I tried writing a song on my life -

If being poetic is a mess, then
is dancing chaotic the address?

I cried and then smiled because I felt sorry,
For the brink, my life, and expectations

I want to be someone, proud for
Just the me, it's difficult

I smile, never reaching the ear
Honey It's a miracle

I still have your address
Like a bam and boom
I want it gone, so badly
because, Life is not a stroll in the garden of lies.

Honestly, I couldn't stop laughing at all, to the point that my stomach felt it would burst open! I was so glad that she never became a singer, at least that's what I could conclude after reading the lyrics. But the honey line felt like she has been betrayed in love. Well, I quite don't even have the idea of what is this girl's age, where was she from and what was her profession. Still her presence in my life felt intriguing, as if it were real like a shadow in the light.

As if for some thousands of days she never touched this diary again, or might have lost it and then found back as her next writing had a different styling, and a really happy fill-in but, dramatically, it was incomplete.

It's been too long and many good things have happened in my life. I finally got my desired freedom and I had to pay a big identity price for it, but it doesn't matter because I am happy. This new life is giving me so much of amazing definition of living. I guess my patience had bore fruit with this fascinating family. Well, the great news is I am PREGNANT, yes! I am going to become a mother and father in law is really happy with the news!!

Now I think the story of Cursed Lovers isn't true at all because I have found my prince amidst all the curses, and redemptions. Oh! I forgot to write, my new name is --

Damn it! I was about to know her name, finally, but no the universus thought it will be an amazing joke to play - for not letting me ever know about the person who was slowly becoming a part of my life, virtually though. She didn't even sign her KN in the last entry, and now that she has changed her name there is no way I can ever find her.

All I wanted to do was give her a hug.

I have zeroed down a few attributes of the girl in this diary, she has a changed identity now, probably above 20 in age because she mentioned pregnancy and she hated silk. But of course with this little information I can never, ever, find out who is she - out of the millions of people in the world and I bet she wasn't a serial killer, so I am positive it is more like an impossible task to find her.

Now I wish I have never found this diary in the library, well, that's what it takes if you skip classes and spend your entire time in a bookstore to catch up things!

After a few months with life, daily errands and a hectic schedule of merciless days, made me completely forget about ever reading someone else's journal. And just like that life went on until one day I accidently decided to use a line from the diary, a borrowed line from this virtually existing girl.

Don't let the future possess you and never become the puppets of your past, live for today, for yourself and don't be trapped in someone's dream!

__________

I am a bit crappy when I write my journal so I don't really have an idea of what people generally write in theirs. Nonetheless I hope this one satisfies the hunger of suspense at the moment!

Sana x

shaan - pride

izzat - respect