PRETTY for a darkskin girl

#teamlightskin

Growing up, all I was ever surrounded by was beautiful lightskinned girls. The few darkskins were considered  "ugly".  But what does ugly even mean? Is it just a matter of perspective and opinion? Or is it a permanent and sure thing? How do people decide that a certain type of person is considered ugly? I wonder these things everyday, but never speak them.

I write in my journal. I'm into that sort of thing. Writing your thoughts and ideas down in such a way that they sound almost poetic. But I don't consider it poetry, its just your innermost feelings. Things you would never say out loud, but still need to get out somehow.

"Austin!" Someone shouted. I look up to see that it is my calculus teacher Ms. Jundy.

"Yes?" I question.

"Are you paying attention? She asks.

"Yes ma'am" I lie.

She looks at me for a while then continues teaching. I'm always getting in trouble for "not paying attention" but really I do hear what she is saying. I'm just not very interested.

After class I meet my best friend Tabitha. Tabitha is a pretty light skin with golden curls, green eyes, and pink pouty lips. I can't help but feel jealous of her sometimes, but then again who wouldn't be?

"Hey Aus" she says smiling while getting her lunch bag from her locker and closing it.

"Hey Tab, ready to go?" I ask. Im so hungry.

"Yeah let's go" she says linking arms with me as we walk to the cafeteria.

We sit with our little group of friends. There is Sean, a white boy who has been "accepted" as a black boy. Stahir (star), who is mixed with Dominican and black. Then there is Hayden, a lightskinned boy that all the girls love because of his hazel eyes. I sit in between Sean and Stahir.

"Y'all heard about what happened with jaselyn and Katee?" Stahir asks.

"No" I say I'm not one to be in other people's drama. It just doesn't interest me.

"They got into it because apparently Jaselyn was sending out screen shots of what Katee said about Candy, and Katee mad because she said no one was sposed to know about it." Stahir explains.

I laugh. "How you always be knowing everybody business?" U ask.

"I be hearing things through the grapevine" she says smiling. We all laugh.

Sean and Hayden leave to go sit with their girlfriends around the end of lunch, so we just talk until the bell rings.

When I enter my english class, I immediately notice Jason Dunham, my crush since 7th grade. Its not like I have a chance though, he has a girlfriend. But that don't stop me from looking (and fantasizing).

I take my seat behind him and begin to copy boring notes on how to be a better writer.

Jason turns around. "Can I borrow a pencil?" He asks.

I get so caught up staring at his beautiful caramel skin and brown eyes that I don't answer.

"Hello!" He says annoyed.

"Huh?" I say, confused.

"Can I borrow a pencil?" He asks once again in an irritated voice.

"Oh yeah, sure" I answer handing one to him.

"Thanks" he mumbles, turning around.

I know he sounds like a douche, but he's not....... Well not all the time but that's besides the point. I keep hoping that one day he will talk to me about something more than a pencil, but that'll never happen.

He only likes lightskinned girls.

Boring start, but it'll get better. Other chapters will be much longer. Please comment suggestions or questions and vote if you liked it.