LETTERS TO YOU • AN iWAOi FANFiC

𝟎𝟐

oikawa- age 27, july 20th, 2021

i sighed softly, pushing the plate in front of me away by a foot, wanting the carrot cake as far away from my physical being as possible. iwa and asaji had planned to do the cake testing together, but asaji had something 'come up' and asked if i could do it for them while they were out. not that iwa-chan had remembered that today was 'special'.

i didn't like asaji much for...obvious reasons, the main one being the fact that she's marrying my lifetime crush, but also because she didn't like me because she was homophobic. being severely religious, her and iwa's biggest fight had been about me, and the fact that she didn't like him being around me because i might um...i don't know...infect him with gay? it's contagious, everyone. run.

yes, i am a raging homosexual. men are just...so very attractive. i've always just kinda known about my sexuality since i was a kid. sadly, so had iwa. and that sexuality was very, very, straight. as straight as the pole i wanted him to dance on in front of me.

he and asaji were getting married in a couple of months. ever since i was in my second year of high school, i had started writing letters to iwa-chan. they had originally been a coping mechanism for me to get over my feelings, or vent, or whatever they did to help, but then they grew to be a sort of diary. i never sent them though, and that was never happening.

and it led to me realizing that i really loved writing. so i started writing romance novels, and they grew to be really popular, usually focusing on an lgbtq+ couple. so now i was quite the popular novelist, and i had been planning to release a new book this year. but with iwa's upcoming wedding and the fact that he has me helping him plan, i had to push the book release to next year.

so here i was, eating my crush's wedding cakes on my birthday instead of a birthday cake.

my stomach churned in indignation as i reached for the next piece of cake.

"yes, you are absolutely right, dear child, let's go far, far away from this table of hell for a bit."

the sun was shining through my bedroom windows quite harshly when i flopped down on the bed (not at all a good idea with an upset stomach, -3/10 would not recommend), so i groaned before getting up to close the curtains.

with a heavy sigh, i glanced at my closet door, fingers itching to open the box hidden inside and submerge myself in letters. i quickly dismissed that idea, still feeling quite proud of myself for not even opening the box, nor writing any more letters ever since iwa had announced his engagement.

after a quick nap, (in which i woke up feeling even worse than before i went to sleep because naps suck) i went back to the table to finish the tasting.

my stomach still hurt, so everything tasted bad. afterward, i felt pretty crappy, so i decided to write some more of my upcoming book to distract myself.

while writing, my feelings just hit me like a truck. my nose started stinging, my eyes blurred, and my entire face burned in humiliation at my own patheticness. pining after a straight guy? god, who was i kidding. i have a bucket list of things i want to do in life, and whatever the hell i was doing is not on it. i'm more into trying skydiving and writing a best selling trilogy than experiencing unrequited love.

the words on my computer blurred as the tears came, and i quickly shut off my computer and clambered into bed, seeing as it was late evening, and might as well go to bed early to avoid crying my eyes out anymore. happy birthday, me.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃