granite. (jikook)

nine.

jungkook

we were sitting down by his living room, me down the floor and jimin up the couch where he told stories all about him. it's nice to know more about him, and i was mistaken that he's a very private person, maybe only to people he isn't close with.

right about now, he was talking all about his school life in korea, which was 7 years ago. he ended school early.

"it was fun, me and my batchmates would meet up every so often. figured i didn't need a job since my parents are rich, they were okay with it." his forehead creased, then they disappeared. "i think they thought there's no point wasting money if i wasn't going to enjoy school anyway. the business is still strong, about 2 years from now i'll run it."

he took a sip of his orange juice, there wasn't wine left in the cupboard.

i grinned. "are you excited?"

he looked at me, and laughed. "with the business? pfft, sure i am. only my brother would be excited about it."

i got confused quickly, isn't that nice though? running your parent's hand built job for you? why did he seem so upset about it? "do you... not like it?"

my hands froze... could their business be... those? oh no, what if they come after me since i know about it? i'll go hide quickly and—

"no! it's not like that! jesus, the color from your face disappeared so quickly!"

i exhaled relief through my mouth.

"no, the business is... pretty formal. like stock trading, but more professional. and it's not that i hate it— just feels like it isn't the ideal job for me. i'd be happier with a job under the company, anything other than a CEO. i hate taking lead in things, because when all goes to hell they blame you."

his face was gloomy, sad. i fought against the strong urge to hug and comfort him.

"can i ask you about something?" my voice came out more hesitant than i expected and i recoiled back.

"um— sure. as long as it isn't uncomfortable for me, shoot."

"can you tell me why you moved to europe?"

i didn't expect his reaction then. his eyes grew wide, angry, but definitely not at me. his grip on the glass was tight but careful. for a second, i regretted asking him. "i'm sorry, shouldn't have asked."

he breathed out and closed his eyes. "no, it's okay. about time i talked about it anyway."

the question might be too personal for him. although he did say it's okay, i almost didn't want him to continue if he felt that bad about it.

"it's not going to be a pretty story, but sure." he dropped the glass and fixed his posture. "my family, is great. especially my mother and father, very successful people. but something happened throughout the relatives that i didn't like. something... very horrible.

"because of that, my brother almost got sent off to america, my mom and dad almost shut off the business. but everything died down when she moved away. my mother didn't like having her around, especially with us."

i gulped. "her?"

he stared at me, and i took in the shiny gloss of tears that were being held back behind them. the sorrow and guilt, the hurting in his heart were too obvious in his eyes. instinctly, i scooted closer to him.

jimin continued. "my grandmother. after my grandpa died, she couldn't cope. didn't know how to. so she turned to drugs and abused it. she lived at home, and word got out about her... issue. that's why the company got sticky, nobody came in contact with us for almost six months, scared that they'd hide drugs with them.

"my brother didn't handle it well, then my other relatives helped and quickly solved it all. my aunt was a reporter from a very famous magazine, she interviewed my mom and the whole thing died down fast. my grandma was sent to a house for old people, she's still there. and occasionally we'd visit.

"i didn't like it. the way they all treated each other like enemies rather than family. especially my parents. but i didn't hate them for it, it was never their fault. but i definitely didn't stand it, so i served military and came back, but not for long. i told them that i wanted to be somewhere far away, and they were okay with it.

"i chose europe, because here— everything's far away. and i always loved life abroad. my brother's still in school. the thing with my grandmother made me sensitive about the job."

after he finished his story, and looked into my eyes, his feelings were raw. unshielded, vulnerable. he quickly broke eye contact and finished his juice.

i understood his feelings, but his mind was still a blank to me.