Viral Love: A Joe and Dianne Novella

Part 3

April 2, 2020
To: DBuzz
From: rina_buswell
Subject: Life update?

Hi Dot,

How are things in London? The news is a bit worrying...you live in such a big city and there's just so many people...I know you're being smart though. Right? Not leaving home without a mask...not interacting with strangers...staying home? 

Send me an update on what you've been up to. I know you must be lonely.

Lots of love,

Mum

April 2, 2020
To: OtiBaby
From: DBuzz
Subject: HELP

SOS! My mum just emailed me asking how I'm holding up because she knows I "must be lonely".

How do I tell her I actually haven't been the slightest bit lonely because I have a next door neighbor who insists on making me dinner? 

April 2, 2020
To: DBuzz
From: OtiBaby
Subject: Re: HELP

Wait a second. I knew he asked you over for dinner again last week but is this becoming like...a weekly thing? Or a NIGHTLY thing?! 

April 2, 2020
To: OtiBaby
From: DBuzz
Subject: Re: Re: HELP

Not NIGHTLY...more like every OTHER night...

Last night he tried this new stir fry recipe - said he watched a YouTube video on how to make it - and omg Oti it was amazing. I will happily let him keep feeding me throughout this pandemic. 

I finally convinced him to let me chip in for the groceries though. It's really unfair that he was buying the food AND cooking it, while I just sit there and stare at him as he slaves over a hot stove. Not that I don't enjoy doing that, because sometimes when he's focusing on the recipes, he puts on these glasses and they are just...whew. It's a lot.

Anyway...I knocked on his door last week and offered to pick up anything he might need from the corner shop. He ended up joining me (we pretended we were from the same household again...Neighbor Joe is making me into a law breaker Oti!!!) and that's sort of become our weekly routine. We go to the shop together, we split the cost of groceries, and in return, he cooks me amazing dinners every other night. 

Anyway you didn't help me answer my question. What do I tell my mum?!

April 2, 2020
To: DBuzz
From: OtiBaby
Subject: Re: Re: Re: HELP

WHY AM I NOT GETTING DETAILED RUN DOWNS OF THESE DATE NIGHTS??? What kind of friendship is this. I need a full, bulleted list of everything you guys talk about. 

Also who cares what you tell your Mum, she doesn't need to know you're breaking the law. Besides, you share a vent...you're sharing air. You're practically in the same household therefore you're not even really breaking the law. 

Speaking of sharing air...has he kissed you yet?!

April 2, 2020
To: OtiBaby
From: DBuzz
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: HELP

God, you are absolutely no help.

(He invited me over tonight. I'll send you a detailed bulleted list, that definitely will not include a kiss, later.)

April 2, 2020
To: rina_buswell
From: DBuzz
Subject: Re: Life Update

Hi Mum!