My First Love Fails

Prologue

"Aelrex, why are we here?" The girl with a cute voice asks.
"I'm gonna fetch my best friend here."

Best friend? Ah, I already knew that but hearing him says that gives a pang in my chest. Could I have a chance to change that into 'his girl'.

"Oh, I see. Who am I then? I consider you as my best friend too though we only meet months ago."

Hearing her says that strikes me, now I remember she's my classmate in one of my subjects. I didn't know anyone in that class that's why I couldn't tell. Aelrex just laugh at her remarks.

"Okay then, you can consider me as your best friend too. I think it's okay of Kinn and I would have a best friend like you."

The girl giggles and nods. Okay, so now I'm oblige to be that girl's best friend too? I ended up sighing again, is this all I'm good at? Nah, I'm good at hiding my emotions and feelings as well. Aelrex glances at my side and see me. I smile. I rarely smile, only when I'm with him. Aelrex glances at girl beside her and smiles at me.

"Hey, Mariae! Do you know her? She's your classmate in literature, Marxine?"

So even my name has the same letter with her, a not so nice coincidence again. I only smile and nod. Marxine seems nice though but I'm not comfortable talking to her right now. I mean, I only meet her today. Aelrex has a driver since he's not in the legal age yet. I sat beside the driver because it will be awkward if I sat beside Marxine, I don't like talking with random conversations with a person I just met.

Aelrex mets my gaze when they sat at the backseat. The backseat seems alive though with them talking, I'm jealous but well I don't have any rights so I put my earpods on. Marxine's the first one to go home and I am next. As we drove on our way home. Aelrex keeps glancing at me in the mirror. I turned off my music.

"Ael, why? Got a problem?" I asked him since it's bothering me big time.

"How was your day Mari?"

I blushed after hearing that name, only Aelrex can calls me that.

"Fine, I bought two books."
"You always buy books, what's with the plot of those books anyway?"
"Falling in love with someone, I guess." Someone like you - a best friend, that I couldn't voice out.

"I should borrow one then since I'm fallin'." I was too shock to process that. He's in love, with whom?
"With?"

He only smiles at me, ignoring my questions but I can see in his eyes that he's definitely in love, that girl must be lucky. I wish I was lucky.
After that talk and I didn't notice that we're at the front of our house. Since Ael is a gentleman, he opens the car's door for me.

"Mari, please eat on time a'ight? Don't read too much, if you want to fall in love just text me, I'll help you. Reading those books that isn't real might not help you 'cause I know sometimes those books contains something that is not right for our age. You could fall at the right person in real life." He has a point, text him? Why would I? If I tell him I fall in love with him would he catch me?

"If I fall, could you catch me?" I bravely say at his face. He was too shock and bit his lips that I know he's nervous.

"I..." I don't want to add pain now. I know he can't.

"Kidding, I'll eat on time. Thank you for the ride."

You're welcome. I'm always at your side Mari, always."

I know 'cause I'm your BEST FRIEND.

Aelrex seems a lot sweeter since I asked him those questions. I don't know, I don't wanna assume 'cause it might break me. He's sweeter to me than Xine, maybe because I'm his long time best friend. Mom knows that I have feelings to Aelrex that's why he always welcomed him warmly every time he's at our house.

"Hey Mariae, I like Aelrex." Xine said, a girls to girls talk with her brought me pain in my chest that I couldn't breath. Why are we having the same feeling towards the same guy.

"Do you like him?" She asked me. What should I tell? Should I say yes? I don't know.

"No. He's my best friend." This was all I could just reply towards that question.

She seems excited about my answer and kiss me in the cheeks as she said the most heartbreaking words I don't want to hear from a friend.

"I will confess to him." She's a lot tougher and stronger than me. She had the urge to confess but I couldn't answer her question properly. I don't wanna chose between friendship and love, this was the part I'm afraid of.

There was a volleyball match and Ael will play so Xine and I will watch and cheer him on 'cause that what friends do, that's what I always do in his every steps in life, as well as Ael cheering me to every academic competitions I joined. As we enter the gym, clouds of noises as well as crowded people cheering even though the game's not starting yet. The game went smoothly and Ael's team is winning as usual. As the game's ending, Xine excused herself so I simply nod. Ael seems tired so the coach let another player play while Ael's resting. I keep glancing at Ael hoping he notice me which he did. He give me a wide smile with his eyes smiling as well, my heart beats fast. "My heart, please be calm." The game ends and Ael's team won the game. The gym's light turned off suddenly so the crowd says the famous "awwww" line, it was so funny. After a few minutes the light at the announcers area turned on making us glance that way. There stands Xine with a mic stand holding an acoustic guitar. I glances back at Ael hoping he didn't notice Xine but who am I joking, all of us saw her. I saw Aeltex smiling at Xine. That moment, I wish I was Xine. The guitar sounds echoes at the gym, I know that sound it was my favorite and I wish it doesn't exist. The song that represents my love for my best friend is also the song that represents Xine's feelings, is it because our name rhymes as well as our feelings?

"Aelrex, I fell in love with you. I fell in love with my best friend."

She says that before she end the song, I wish I could muster up that courage too. The crowds been cheering for them, as if Xine's proposed a marriage. This scene is breaking my fragile heart. I'm in too much pain that I can't even breath. I saw Ael coming towards Xine with a big grin on his face. Hell yeah, he confessed that he was in love with her best friend too and I goddamn wish it was me. I remember that day,we we're happily talking about our days in school when he told me this exact words that stabs my heart.

"Mari, I fell in love..."

I was dumbfounded that time, how? When? Let it be me, please. I was praying silently.

"I fell in love with my best friend."

That gives too much joy to my existence but he ended my happiness with a name "Xine"