Where You Go ― Jason Grace

ix. whatever happens

AT THE END of the hall stood a walnut door with a bronze plaque:

ASCLEPIUS
MD, DMD, DME, DC, DVS, FAAN, OMG, EMT, FRCP, ME, IOU, OD, OT, PHARMD, BAMF, RN, PHD, INC., SMH

There may have been more acronyms in the list, but Ophelia was already having to fight a headache.

Piper knocked. "Dr. Asclepius?"

The door flew open. The man inside had a kindly smile, crinkles around his eyes, short salt-and-pepper hair and a well-trimmed beard. He wore a white lab coat over a business suit and a stethoscope around his neck—your stereotypical doctor outfit, except for one thing: Asclepius held a polished black staff with a live green python coiled around it.

"Hello!" Asclepius said.

"Doctor." Piper's smile was so warm it would've melted a Boread. "We'd be so grateful for your help. We need the physician's cure."

Ophelia wasn't even her target, but Piper's charmspeak washed over her instantly. She would've done anything to help her get that cure. She would've gone to medical school, got twelve doctorate degrees and bought a large green python on a stick.

Asclepius put his hand over his heard. "Oh, my dear, of course. I would be delighted to help."

Piper's smile wavered, like she was surprised by Asclepius's agreement. "You would? I mean, of course you would."

"Come in! Come in!" Asclepius ushered them into his office.

Asclepius took the big comfy doctor's chair and laid his staff and serpent across his desk. "Please, sit!"

Ophelia and Piper took the two chairs on the patients' side, leaving Jason and Leo to stand.

"So." Asclepius leaned back. "I can't tell you how nice it is to actually talk with patients. The last few thousand years, the paperwork has got out of control. Rush, rush, rush. Fill in forms. Deal with red tape. Not to mention the giant alabaster guardian who kills everyone in the waiting room. It takes all the fun out of medicine!"

"Yeah," Leo said. "Hygeia is kind of a downer."

Asclepius grinned. "My real daughter Hygeia isn't like that, I assure you. She's quite nice. At any rate, you did well reprogramming the statue. You have a surgeon's hands."

Jason shuddered. "Leo with a scalpel? Don't encourage him."

The doctor god chuckled. "Now, what seems to be the trouble?" He leaned forward and peered at Jason. "Hmm... Imperial gold sword wound, but that's healed nicely. No cancer, no heart problems. Watch that mole on your left foot, but I'm sure it's benign."

Jason blanched. "How did you—?"

"Oh, of course!" Asclepius said. "You're a bit short-sided! Simple fix."

He opened his drawer, whipping out a prescription pad and an eyeglasses case. He scribbled something on the pad, then handed the glasses and the scrip to Jason. "Keep the prescription for future reference, but these lenses should work. Try them on."

"Wait," Leo said. "Jason is short-sighted?"

Jason opened the case. "I—I have had a little trouble seeing stuff from a distance lately," he admitted. "I thought I was just tired." He tried on the glasses, which had thin frames of Imperial gold. He blinked. "Wow. Yeah. That's better."

Ophelia smiled. "Cute."

"You look very distinguished," Piper said.

"I don't know, man," Leo said. "I'd go for contacts—glowing orange ones with cat's-eye pupils. Those would be cool."