As Long As You Care: A Ruel Novel

Not Thinkin' Bout You

Ruel

This is not at all how I imagined me and (your name) after we kissed. I haven't talked to her all day and she's avoiding my gaze. I felt so happy that night at the party everything seemed normal but now I feel like we're drifting apart. I guess pinky promises don't mean anything. I don't understand, is she not interested? Were we just friends all along? I've got to focus I've got to get good grades this term, I don't have time to think about girls. "All the times we had keep on rushing back. Filling up my head the words you said you got me stressed the way you left me. How I'm feeling now, want to push it down. Want to block the sound and drown it out so I'm not thinkin 'bout you" I really need to focus now...after I write that in my notebook. Suddenly, (your name) leans over and drops a note on my desktop. "Can we just be friends again?" it says in her curly handwriting. "Of course." I reply, but it's hard for me. Of course, I don't want to be just friends it should have said, but I was right all along. She's not interested.

You

I want to cry. This isn't how it's supposed to be. We were supposed to ride off in the sunset like in the movies. Not ignore each other all day until I get so restless, I must drop a note on his desk. I've been dreaming of this day for so long and it didn't meet my expectations. Ruel got a hall pass and left the room. He accidentally shoved his notebook off his desk. I pick it up to put it back, but I'm caught by some words. Goodness did he wright this? It's amazing they look like lyrics to songs. Who are they about? Whoa! Slow down they aren't about you, they might not even be about anyone they are just words on a page. Ruel's coming back I set it back on his desk. After the bell rings, I approach him in the hall, "Hey, I saw your notebook." He looks at me like I just ran over his cat, "Oh." Is all he can say, "Those poems are really good you could turn them into songs you know?" "Why were you going through my stuff?" I've never seen him so angry he's practically shouting, "I'm sorry, it fell off your desk and I just saw a little bit. I didn't know you were so sensitive about it." "Well just don't do it again. And the poems don't mean anything they aren't going anywhere so just forget about it." "But Ruel they were amazing!" "I SAID FORGET ABOUT IT" Heads turn as he shouts in the hallway. I'm so angry I can feel my face burning. Ruel and I don't talk for the rest of the day. After school I run into Xander at the grocery store. "Hey, I heard there's another party tonight and don't tell anyone but you're kind of cute do you want to go with me." My initial reaction is no. No no no no no. Then I think back to the events of the day, Ruel won't go with me. Brooklyn probably already has a date. "Yes." and I try so hard not to cringe at the word. "Well I'll pick you up at around 10:00". Oh crap.