His Broken Angel (BoyXBoy)

XXVI

Song: Love The Way You Lie by Rihanna (Without Eminem)

********

My head was pounding. Most likely because I cried myself to sleep. I felt pathetic. I've never cried this much over someone I wasn't dating. Much less crying for a whole damn week. I groaned and swallowed the aspirins and water. I dragged my body to the shower. After showering and brushing my teeth, I dragged on my underwear and sweatpants. I wasn't in the mood to wear a shirt. I took out a cigarette from the box in my draw and lit it. I sat in the couch and exhaled deeply.

"Why the fuck are you on my mind Cole?" I whispered as I placed the cigarette back between my lips.

Because you love him dipshit!

I scoffed. That word seemed surreal. Love. It left a bitter taste in my mouth. I hated the word. It was nothing. I promised myself that I wouldn't fall again. But with Cole, it made me question if I was in love with Jason or did I just love him? I scoffed once again and exhaled the gathered smoke from between my lips. I glanced at the clock. 12:30. I really did wake up late today and I wasn't in the mood to study. A knock came at my door. I eyed the door wishing the person behind it would just leave me alone. I inhaled the cigarette before releasing it. The knock came again.

"Come on Austin, I know you're in there." A voice said. I rolled my eyes but got up to pull the door.

I don't know I did. But my body seemed to have a mind of its own and did whatever the fuck it wanted to. I rolled my eyes and opened the door. I exhaled the smoke from my cigarettes right before him. He scrunched up his nose.

"What?" I asked annoyed.

"Can we talk?"

"No."

Yes

"You've been avoiding all my calls and all my texts. You left the bar without telling me. What the hell is going on Austin?"

I winced at the name Austin but ignored the gut wrenching feeling. I scoffed at him and attempted to close my door. His foot lodged itself in the way. I raised my eyebrow. Cole pushed the door open and walked in. I sighed and closed it behind him.

"Austin! Fucking look at me!" He yelled. I rolled my eyes once again and lit another cigarette blowing out the air. I stared at him pointedly.

"I don't have to talk to you about shit Cole! Just fucking leave." I yelled back.

"No!"

"No?"

"I said no. I go outside for 5 minutes and come back to see you gone. At first I thought that you were just tired but I tried calling. You didn't fucking answer! I texted you. You didn't fucking reply! Now I come to find out why the fuck you have been avoiding me and you want me to leave? I'm not going anywhere." He sneered.

I rolled my eyes and my fists balled as I was getting angrier by the second.

"I've been avoiding you cause you invited Paris. You know damn well I don't like her. Paris isn't even her real name!" I yelled.

Austin isn't yours either.

"Just because you don't like her doesn't mean you need to throw accusations at her!" He yelled. I scoffed.

"There you go defending her. What does it take for you to see that she wants you and isn't anything like she says she is?"

Are you forgetting that neither are you?

"Some actual prove!"

"Her kissing you isn't enough prove for you?" I sneered rolling my eyes.

Cole looked taken back.

"Austin I-"

"Don't Cole. I've had enough. Enough lies. Enough of people trying to gain my trust, just to break it. I'm honestly tired. If you don't mind I would like for you to leave now please. I have exams to prepare for." I said. My voice was firm but weak.

It was true. I was tired of everything. Tired of empty promises, blatant lies, broken trusts. I was tired of it all. I was tired of lying to people just to protect them and myself. Just so very tired. Cole walked towards me. I thought he would have just left.

Instead he pinned my body to the door and kissed my lips roughly. My outed cigarette fell to the floor. His lips explored mine and I didn't fight him. Even if I wanted to, I couldn't. My body knew his touches and it was surrendering to him. He bit my bottom lip which caused me to moan arching slightly. He pulled my bottom lip between his teeth causing me to whimper. My lips moved along with his giving him control. He tasted like strawberries. Probably what he ate last. The kiss was slow almost teasing and daunting. It was passionate but filled with anger all at the same time. Cole pulled away allowing us to breath.

"I only want you. Not her. For God's sake, I'm gay, not bi. Now will you let me explain?" He said. I mutely nodded.

I couldn't speak. Cole slowly released my arms. My hand immediately touching my lips.

"When we went to the club, we were all enjoying ourselves. Paris had a little too much to drink and I lost her for a while. I went around the back and saw her. I was helping her inside to call a cab for her to go home. That's when she kissed me. I pushed her off. We got into an argument after about it. I called her a cab and then I came to find you. But Hazel told me you were already gone and when I asked why, she just scoffed at me. I understand why she did now." He said and chuckled at the end.

I looked down. I felt terrible for how I acted without knowing the story but I was just so hurt. Cole kissed my lips once again.

"I promise you. Nothing is going on. Nothing will be going on." He said. I nodded. "Now what was this about Paris not being her real name?"

I sighed and moved to get the folder from my draw.

"Don't ask where I got this information from cause I can't tell you. I never wanted to be the one to tell you cause it's not my place."

And I know what it's like to not want people to know about your past.

I handed Cole the folder. He looked over it and studied it. He then sighed. I played with my fingers while he read.

"I would prefer if she was the one to tell me. But thank you nevertheless." He said.

I nodded.

"I-" We both started. I smiled sheepishly.

"You go first." I said.

"I want to take you out. Please? Just to make up for last week." I nodded.

"Sounds like a plan. Just let me go get ready."

Cole smiled as I went to get dressed. My secret was going to remain a secret for a bit longer. My stomach churned. I sighed. If we didn't last as whatever we were, that would be one more person exposed to danger. Could I risk that?

Did I want that?

*****

Just gonna stand there and watch me burn!!!!!!!

They are making progress. Lovely progress. Well I don't have much to say today more than how are yah?

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Love,
MsComplex💋