Inhaling my Regrets (ON-GOING)

Prologue

"I shouldn't be here..." I whispered to myself, having doubts if I should go inside.

"...deep breaths, Kleo" I sighed. Binuksan ko 'yung pinto at agad na bumungad sa akin si Mochi. Our dog.

"Hi baby, how are you?" I said while scratching her tummy. She barked as her reply.

"Mommy's okay" I smiled

I continued walking 'til I reached our sofa. Nakita ko si Raven na naka tulog na habang naka andar pa yung T.V. I sat on the rag at tinitigan siya.

"I'm sorry love... It was an accident... I promise" I cried. I was about to go upstairs

.........

"Hey love, how was your day?" he spoke while his face remained on the screen. He was watching netflix with his arms on the back rest of the couch. A Perfect timing and a perfect way of denial.

"It was fine" I lied

"Have you eaten yet?" he took the Pizza out of the box and offered it to me.

"I'm full" I was trying to avoid him before he notices something.

"You should at least eat something. You should remember that you're not the only who's eating there..." his eyes pointed my belly. I averted my gaze, trying to avoid his eyes to meet mine.

"...you might starve yourself and the baby" I froze when he said that. All the things that happened earlier came flashing back inside my head. I should at least act like nothing happened right? What if he'll notice? Will I stay alone forever? What if-

"Kleo" I snapped back to reality

"You're acting weird love, is something or someone bothering you?" I remained shut. Am I being too obvious?

"Is it because you're pregnant?" I looked down to avoid his eyes "I understand" he added and turned his gaze back to continue his business.

"I'll just change my clothes. I'm feeling dirty" I said and ran upstairs

"BE CAREFUL!" he's voice shouted

I went inside our room and took off my clothes. I decided to take bath since I'm feeling sticky due to what happened earlier. I breathed in as my skin touched the surface of the water. Wish I could stay a lil bit longer here.

I went down stairs as soon as I finished my bath to grab a cup of water. I felt Raven's presence behind me then suddenly he caressed my stomach.

It makes me more guilty seeing you caress an empty womb.

I faked a smile and then faced him looking directly through his eyes. Every part in his face is just too perfect, no wonder girls tend to look at him in a agog way.

I rolled my eyes which made him chuckle. I turned my eyes on his lips, looking through those rosy lips makes me wanna kiss it endlessly.

"You ain't gonna gain something by just looking" he said then he smirked. This pervert!

I let go of him then went to the sofa to watch the movie he was watching earlier. He was watching Mulan from disney channel which made me laugh.

"Bata?" I let out a hard laugh but he just ignored me. This guy.

We were watching the movie seriously, even though I've watched this a hundred times now, I would still prefer to watch this again and again.

The scene we were looking at right now was when Mulan got caught lying for dressing up as a man. I looked at Raven but sad to say he was really into it, I shouldn't disturb him he might scold me if I would.

"She should have just told it earlier, look at her. People that's close to her lost trust in her" he spoke, the words he was saying has meanings to me. 

"but I'll wait till this baby comes out.." he caressed and kissed my stomach.

"...and I'll be the happiest person seeing the baby we made that day" he stand to kiss my forehead

"Let's sleep you need to keep your body healthy, and I don't wanna end up losing my two favorite person" that made me froze preventing my tears to drop through my cheeks.

We lied down our bed and he hugged me tightly our position was like I was at his chest while his at my head.

"H-Hey love?" I nervously said

"Hmm?" I felt him sniffing my hair

"A-Anong gender gusto mo sa a-anak natin?" I stammered then he laughed

"No need to be nervous, love" he laugh, he's so inoccent

"I wanna have a girl.." he released his grip then he looked up

"...I wanna have two important and beautiful girls in my life, to defend too, and to protect too" he smiled then looked at me.

"I don't wanna see you both being disrespected" he said seriously.

I could tell that he really wanted a baby huh? and this makes me overthink more.

I just ruined it.

"Love?" I bit my lower lip thinking if I should tell him.

'What if I lost the baby?' I wanted to ask him but I don't wanna find out his answer knowing that it could make me even more insecure.

"Hmm?" he looked at me then he smiled.

"I...." I was sweating afraid for him to know the secrets I've been hiding from him.

"I love you" I faked a smile and hugged him, placing my face on his chest.

"I love you more" he hugged me tightly and kissed my forehead.

Will this secret last forever? The more the secret last the more the problem grows.

Would his boyfriend accept the fact that her girlfriend miscarriage?

What if the boy finds out? What if the boy leaves after finding out?

Would they wake up and snap back to reality?

Would they try to take a simple glimpse forgetting the struggles they encountered by wishing to go back through time?

Well stay tune if you wanna know more..

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