Glee Spring Break

Making up...Again

(Brittany's POV)

We just finished playing Never Have I Ever and Santana asked to talk to me in her room. We'd have more privacy there since Quinn is still at Finn and Puck's. I don't think I'm mad at Santana... I definitely don't want to be considering we just made up. But I'm just shocked she never told me. I mean, we were best friends long before we were girlfriends and isn't that the kinda thing you tell your best friend? I can't help but feel weird now about all the times she and Quinn have kissed during spin the bottle, or the fact that they share a room. Of course I know Santana would never cheat on me and I know Quinn is too good of a friend to do that either, but I still just don't feel right about the whole situation.

I guess I've been lost in my thoughts ever since we sat down on the couch because when Santana placed her hand on my leg I snapped back to reality. "Britt, what are you thinking? It's obvious you're upset and I want to talk about it."

I sigh. "Well for starters I don't understand why you didn't tell me. Before we even got together we told each other everything and yet I never knew about this. And also, I feel like that would kind of be important information to tell someone when you get in a relationship with them."

Santana nodded and took her hand away. "You're right. I guess I didn't tell you back then, well for a couple reasons. One, I still hadn't accepted who I was and who I liked yet. So I didn't want to share that with anyone. I wasn't ready for people to see me differently. That's something I still struggle with so you have to imagine how hard that would have been for me back then."

I nod. "What's the other reason?"

She slightly smiled but then it went away as she remembered the situation we're in. "Well even back then, I knew how I felt about you. And it felt like if I told you, it would scare you away, or it would open a conversation I wasn't ready for, or on the off chance that you felt the same way as me, I was afraid you'd think I wasn't interested and that I liked Quinn or something."

I nodded again. I let out a little smile too but it went away as fast as hers did. "I get it."

"And honestly," she continued. "I didn't tell you when we got together because I haven't thought about it in such a long time. I literally forgot it happened until it got brought up. That's how little it crosses my mind. So I didn't even think to tell you because I didn't remember to."

"That makes sense." I say. "I don't know. I'm not mad at you. I just feel weird about it, you know?"

"I get that. I would feel the same. But trust me, if it had crossed my mind, I would have told you. I guess you've been acting as a good distraction since you're really all I think about." She smiles at me and nudges me and I can't help but grin. "But I'm sorry you found out in such a weird way and not from me."

"Thank you." I pause and then look at her. "So it really meant nothing?"

"Meant nothing. A one time drunken night." She assures me.

"Was it like awkward between you guys after?" I ask.

She tilts her head in thought. "I guess maybe for a little. We woke up the next morning with killer hangovers and we briefly talked about it later on. But once we got past the initial shock of what we did, we got over it and then it was like it never happened."

"I can't believe I didn't notice anything." I say.

"I think it happened over the summer or like during a time where we all didn't see each other every day. I don't really remember. All I know is that it was a while ago and we were fine really shortly after."

I lightly laugh. "I just can't imagine my two best friends doing it."

She laughs too. "I wouldn't be able to either."

"So," I say. "How was it?"

Santana goes wide eyed. "Um. Let's change the subject..."

"Oh come on," I tease. "You used to tell me every single detail of your hookups..." I laugh.

She smiles and shakes her head. "That was before."

"Before what?" I ask.

"Before I told you how in love with you I am..." she pauses, "I would have said before I fell in love with you, but I'm pretty sure I fell in love with you the day we met."

I swear my heart melted at her words. I lean and cup her cheek with one hand and connect our lips. After one long innocent kiss, we pull away.

"Are we okay?" She asks.

I nod and smile at her. "We're okay."

I try and fight off a yawn but it shows anyway. Santana notices and she lightly giggles. She stands up and extends her hand out to me. "Come on, lets get you to bed."

Of course I want to hangout with her more, but I can't deny how tired I was getting. I had slept horribly the last two nights because of the terms Santana and I were on. So I take her hand and stand up. We walk hand in hand to my room and she waits while I do my little routine. Once I get in bed, she stands up and kisses my forehead like she was getting ready to leave.

I grab her arm. "Are you not staying?"

"I'll lay with you for a little bit," She says getting under the covers with me. "I have to get back and talk to Quinn. She feels really bad and thinks you hate her now." She laughs.

I giggle too as I scoot over closer to Santana and rest my head on her chest while my arm and hand rest on her stomach. "Tell her I don't hate her."

She wraps her arm around me so I can nuzzle closer against her. "Don't worry, I'll explain to her that you and I talked about it."

"Good." I say. "By the way, if you had told me back then, I wouldn't have run away. You could never make me leave you."

She strokes my hair and I hear her mouth curve into a smile. "I know that, Britt. I realize now I could have told you when it happened." She kisses my head. "I think we would have ended up together no matter what."

I smile against her chest as I lightly drag my nails on her arm that's resting at her side. "Really?"

I feel her nod. "I just feel like we always would have found our way to each other somehow."

I don't know how it's possible but I smile even wider. "Do you think about that kinda stuff a lot?"

Santana kisses my head again. "I do."

"What else do you think about?" I ask, still scratching her arm.

"I think about how I was never really happy until I met you. I mean there would be stuff that made me happy and smile but it wasn't until you, that it became a consistent thing and it's because of you that I realized there's a difference between being happy and just being content."

I drag my nails down her arm and to her hand, where I intertwine our fingers and rub her hand with the pad of my thumb, "What else?"

"I think about how no matter how sad I ever feel, or no matter how hard my life gets, I always think about you and get reminded that there's always something to be happy about, or to be grateful for."

I continue playing with her hand, "What else?"

"That I don't know how it's possible, but it's crazy to me that I love you more and more every day. I mean I thought I loved you the day I met you, which I'm positive I did, but it's only grown since then and it still continues to. I just had no idea it was possible to love someone so much."

I move my head and look up at her. "I love you so much, Santana." I lean up and peck her lips. "And I can't wait to make you tell me what else you think about, and for me to tell you all the things I think about."

She cutely giggles.

"I look forward to it, Britt."